


Not Kyle's best idea

by Sleeping_Regn



Category: South Park
Genre: Adult Life, Almost smut, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Never Met, Attempt at Sexual Tension, Bebe is Queen™, Best Friends, Falling In Love, Fluff, Guilt, Horny, I'm not sure what to do with myself after writing that, Idiots in Love, Infidelity, Journalist Kyle, Kyle trying to do the good things, M/M, Semi-Public Sex, Tattoo Artist Stan, Unresolved attraction, blowjob, lot of kisses, perhaps, relationships, sue me
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-28
Updated: 2020-11-21
Packaged: 2021-01-05 20:34:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 31,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21214676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sleeping_Regn/pseuds/Sleeping_Regn
Summary: See, the thing with meeting parents it’s to not appear bad - maybe it won't be good at first but as long as you look clean it should be enough.Yet Kyle realized that his girlfriend’s brother was hot enough to forget about it.





	1. Maybe ice cream was a bad idea

Kyle passed a hand on his neck as he tried to survive the wave of heat without the AC of his car.  
The sun was aggressive, not at all presenting a soft summer and more intending to cook people alive in their car.

“Try to be really nice— even with my stupid brother, especially him,” she precised checking her makeup for the hundred time in the car mirror, “he is so miserable he keeps telling me that I would end alone. What a turd.”

“Okay.” The man stared at the house in front of his car, certain that her family must already know that they were here. “You ready Shelly?”  
He was starting to feel depressed about staying in the car when the door was only a few steps away, and nothing on her face had changed since they had taken the road.

“Am I looking good?” The brunette asked, passing a lock of hair behind her ear and he guessed she wanted his approbation so he nodded with a small smile to hide his indifference.  
“Great, let’s go Kyle.”

Stepping out of the car as she did, he went to open the trunk to get out a bottle of wine when she looked around. The lunch was simply for the presentations and Shelly had insisted that he was doing too much - when she also pressed him to make the best impression - but Kyle cared about his manner, especially in exchange of a cooked meal.  
Maybe she just wanted to keep the bottle of wine instead of giving it to them.

“Shelly!” A cheerful voice exclaimed after the main door opened.  
Easily guessing that was her mother calling for her, he immediately put on a smile as he closed the trunk, meeting her gaze and she pleasantly gasped at his view.

Walking toward them with a bright expression, the woman didn’t leave him out of her gaze.  
“Hey mom,” Shelly greeted and glanced at Kyle who joined her side. “We aren’t late, right?”

“No— of course not,” the woman replied with delight and properly turned toward him, “nice to meet you, call me Sharon. Kyle, is it?”

“Yes, Kyle Broflovski, really nice to meet you ma’am,” he smiled the most pleasantly possible before she scoffed with a move of a hand and trapped him in a surprise hug.

“Come on, don’t be so polite, we aren’t going to eat you,” Sharon chuckled and checked him head to toes to kindly bring him toward the door, leaving a gentle hand on his arm. “It’s so nice that you could come. Shelly said you have a lot of work and that you weren’t sure until the last minute if you could come.”

“Hum ye-”

“Mom, come on! Let my boyfriend breathe,” her daughter exclaimed and shushed her off his arm to grab it. Kyle reprimanded a small scowl at her action, feeling that was too much especially in front of her mother.

“Sorry, it has just had been a while since you brought someone and you really, really said a lot of good things about him.” She explained grinning as she opened the door to bring them in. “Randy! Come here! They are here.”

The mother pressed them to walk in while the ginger couldn’t help but feel genuinely surprise by the welcome and how great Sharon seemed to be.  
Kyle silently watched to living room, trying to find family pictures and something to talk about in case of a flop before it turns inconfortable. He caught the sight of a photo of what must be Shelly and her brother, accompanied by a dog, without a chance to examine it further he turned to the loud exclamation from the garden.

“Oh, hey Shelly! My girl!” A raven bearded man joined her wife in the living room a beer in his hand.

“That’s Shelly’s boyfriend,” Sharon praised with a warm smile to him which brought him a small comfort, yet a nervous smile appeared on his face.

“Hello sir, Kyle Broflovski,” he greeted without missing a syllable as he smiled, his own mother would be proud. The man of the Marsh’s house didn’t seem uncomfortable or annoyed but he took moments before he smiled a bit and shook the presented hand.  
He could smell that wasn’t his first beer and tried to not wide his eyes when he felt Shelly’s father sweaty hand crushing his.

“Right, good to meet you boy,” he replied, clear crumbs of chips in his beard before he whipped it with the back of his hand holding the can.

The redhead tried to keep his smile up. “Same here.”

“Where is Stan?” Shelly spat behind him and half-returned a smile to his father. “Did he ditch like the loser he is?” By her loud tone, her boyfriend supposed she was trying to lure him out of a closet, too ready to smash him.

“He went to walk Sparky before lunch,” she explained before grabbing the bottle he had brought. “Thank you Ky-“

“What? That dog is still alive?”

Sharon frowned at that comment and pronounced her name in a clear warning before she turned back to check the gift with raising eyebrows.  
“Thank you for that— uhm.” Her french pronunciation almost worked for the name of the wine but she embarrassingly laughed at the end.

Kyle simply restrained the goofy grin, wanting to be the nicest with her. He curled his lips to reassure her before he started to talk.  
“My father loves this one, always opening it when he is-”

“Wait, Sharon! I can read that,” her husband explained grabbing the bottle before he started to pronounce it horribly.

“Urgh dad, you are embarrassing please.” Their daughter exclaimed with a grimace. “Make yourself at home, Kyle,” she proposed caressing his arm and he nodded with a faint smile.

“Randy, put his jacket aside.” Her wife grabbed back the bottle with a scowl and by the faint blush she was embarrassed by him. Her husband watched her walk to the kitchen next to Shelly with confused eyes before he went back to his guest.

“Oh, right, right,” he gulped down his whole beer before he made him a sign to follow. Kyle pressed the path, smelling the sweat now that he actually paid attention to something else than his itching need to wash his hand.  
Kyle politely insisted on taking himself his light dark vest off so he would not touch it.  
“You want a beer? Anything?”

“Urhm, not yet thanks,” he declined before he noticed through the glass doors that the girls went to the backyard where he had seen the table fully prepared for lunch.  
“Could I know where the bathroom is?”

“Yeah, uh, upstairs door right in front of you.” He pointed the stairs, whipping his nose with the back of his hand. The youngest nodded to thank him and start to walk up before he sharply stopped when Randy loudly called him.  
“You like BBQ, right? You aren’t some vegan or some stupid sh-stuff, like that— you eat meat?”

The redhead felt the small prejudices, reprimanding a roll of eyes he shook his head with a tight smile. “No, not at all I love meat.”

“Great.” He walked away and Kyle felt like he could openly lose his friendly face to exhale his distress.

Quietly walking toward what he assumed to be the bathroom, his feet paused a moment to look at the hanged picture of the whole family over the small table against the corridor wall. He was a bit surprised at the huge brace Shelly had but slipped his eyes away to watch the other members, only the parents were brightly smiling while their son seemed uncomfortable and he could share the feeling by how his sister was glaring at him.  
Kyle had felt that her hatred for the boy in a blue and red hat was from a long time but still couldn’t understand how it can end up like that. He couldn’t imagine his little brother and himself wanting to cut each other throats.  
And they had some big fights.

The bathroom was clean and tidy, which reassured him from the look the father has but he convinced himself that he shouldn’t judge a book by its cover. Maybe it was just the season doing that to him.  
His eyes wandered on his simple shirt as he meticulously washed his hands.  
Kyle knows that Shelly insisted on him really being ‘classy’ but he also didn’t want to be a show-off, fashion wasn’t his domain and he would have been more comfortable if it had happened in winter with a good pullover or turtleneck. But that lunch ended up happening in the end of spring so he had to adapt.

He couldn’t help but notice that the soap was more a perfumed than effective one which brought him to frown at his obsession with germs, Shelly won’t thank him for starting to act. Shaking his head as he dried his hands, he scanned his combed hair already seeing some curls ready to go wild.  
Noises came from the outside of the bathroom, downstairs, and he supposed that must be their son coming back, Stanley if he correctly recalled. The smell of grilled meat reached him as he folded his sleeves.

The pensive ginger startled in surprise when the door was slammed open, making the present mirror reflect a bare chest and a running dog that he unfortunately noticed - and tried to face - too late as it directly jumped on his ass with a bark.  
“Shi— no!” He squealed in a hurry and tried to get the animal out of his jeans.  
His attempt wasn’t confident enough to push it away as it could be one of those guard dog who bites.

“Boy! Sparky!” A voice that he would have found particularly pleasant at the right time called the jumping animal before the pet was grabbed and put against a chest; Kyle did notice that the man is a bit muscular.  
“Fuck— sorry,” a ravenhead breathed. The dog let his tongue fall out of his mouth as he glanced between the two people.

They stared at each other, the guest not sure how to react at the surprise attack and what to say to a guy who showed up with his shirt around his arm instead of on him.

“Hum,” Kyle licked his lips not quite sure what he could say when his eyes were trying to slide toward the beginning of his loose jogging where some dark hair were visible. He preferred to return back to his head.

The figure with simple surprise on his face cleared his throat and smiled, a sincere and tingling-your-stomach one. “Hi, uh, who are you?”

If Kyle wasn’t so sure in which house he is, or that he has similarities with the young boy on the framed pictures, he would have dumbly returned the question while his head was trying to wrap around the breathtaking fact that Shelly’s brother is hotly handsome.

“Uhm.” His mind had blanked at the sight of his amused and slightly curled up eyes; he wanted to know their colors. Not sure anymore why he was here, he travelled the room with his eyes before he returned to the excited dog in his arms.  
He was seriously about to answer but the reason of his presence loudly echoed.

“Kyle? What are you doing?” Shelly inquired downstairs with an annoying tone.

The redhead took a deep breath before he glanced away from her brother’s figure, to not feel any more guilty at his contemplation. “I’m coming!”  
The black haired turned with conflicted eyebrows toward the stairs before he turned to Kyle, wide eyes.  
“I’m— Shelly’s boyfriend,” he articulated.

His eyes faded in something he hadn’t a word close to by the fast changes.  
“What?” He croaked in pure incomprehension. “My sister?”

“Yes.”

He gasped after a lost tongue peeked. “S-Seriously?”

“Yeah?”

“You?”

“What does that mean?” Kyle tried to scoff to not show how unpleasant his question was. If he was going to judge him if he is ‘good enough’ he should at least wear something.

“I— hum, you know, you don’t look like…”

“What?” He frowned.

“Nothing,” Stanley hurried as he settled back down his dog, looking at it with a tightened smile most likely unsure of what to say. “He wasn’t going to attack you— he is just really excited to meet new people.”

“Okay, right,” Kyle sighed in a small breath looking at the dog, “Sparky, is it?”

“Yeah, uh, Kyle,” he wondered with a questioning eyebrow before he grinned at his nodd, ”I’m Stan.”

“Yes, I know my girlfriend’s brother,” he insisted feeling that at this point he will have to jump out of the window; and not because he felt the birth of butterflies in his stomach. It was starting to be more suffocating minute by minute. Kyle swore he never expected summer to be hot so fast.

“Oh yeah, Shelly’s—“ Stan articulated with a clear pain at that name-“boyfriend.”

“Yes.”  
Their eyes glued on each other, barely not noticing the dog loudly smelling its genitals and if they did they kept that out. Kyle sharply gazed away noticing the pretty choice of wall carrelage for the side of the bath.  
He pointed the stairs behind the brother, but Stan didn’t even turn to follow the direction. Kyle clutched his finger before he exhaled something, maybe his heart because it really seemed about to burst out of his chest.  
“I should go.”

“Oh. Ye-yeah,” he nodded and moved to let him a free passage but even with that the guest was not sure if it was safe enough. Safe for what, that’s what he was trying to find out with hesitant steps.  
“I, hm, don’t walk around half-naked,” the slightly tanned man specified with a shy tone, not meeting his eyes more than a beat when he got the bright green irises on him.

Kyle forced a sympathetic chuckle out of his lacking of air lungs. “Of course.”  
He didn’t want to add a joking comment that he must be lucky then, but he sure loved the view.

“I wanted to get a shower before, uh, lunch,” Stan explained glancing at the shower before he slowly returned his attention to him.

“Sure, yes, good idea,” he agreed and finally moved from his spot in front of the sink he had been skirting but the dog immediately jumped on his paws to hurry at his side and sniff. “Uh—”  
Kyle wanted to say that he isn’t afraid of dog, because he must look like it but what disturbed him more was Stan practically following his pet. Or he just stood up and made him realize there weren’t a lot of distance between them; one could easily grab the other and close the distance.

“Sparky go to your bed,” Stan ordered with a pointy finger toward the corridor, which was calmly followed by the old pet. He faced the ginger back with an amused smile, possibly from the surprise which had bloomed on Kyle’s face at the sound of a firm tone from his smooth voice, “he is really friendly you know.”

“Yeah, he looks like it, really— I like dogs. I just don’t want to get my jeans dirty for lunch,” he explained with a small embarrassment because he really sounded like a clean freak now.

“Oh, don’t worry your ass is really good.”  
Kyle silenced his betraying pleased gasp, with a small frown he stared at him as he bite the inside of his bottom lip to not reveal anything. Stan furiously flushed, looking away and almost kicking the bin when he stepped back; both of them were trying to find their composure.  
The rush of hot blood also infected the redhead who tried to breath like a normal person, without relinquishing on the blunt compliment.  
“I mean—! Your jeans! Not-not your ass,” he mumbled shamefully staring at the wall or maybe the mirror, “n-not that uhm—“ one of his hands passed on his mouth and stayed here to contain any other words wanting to get out.

“O-Okay,” the redhead articulated, more quick on escaping the awkward room, although he was tempted to look at what the other was staring at. “Hum, see you at lunch Stan.”

“Yeah, yeah,” the ravenhead nodded behind his now two hands to hide his wide blush as he walked away.

Before Kyle fully lost his view on the floor upstairs, he briefly turned to see the opened bathroom but the confrontation of a staring Stan made him quickly walk down the last stairs.

Now. The jewish man had a lot of ideas as a kid for his future life. For every kind of situation or job he would choose to do, even some romantic ideas because he was unwillingly attentive during those kind of movies. He really wished it wasn’t the case.  
And now he wished that he had seen one where one of the main character started to make out with the sibling of the ‘proper’ lover.  
How would you end up heavily making out with your girlfriend’s brother? That was something Kyle had never wondered and frankly, he had to answer a lot of weird questions as he grew up in his small town.

Kyle found himself clinging at Stan by his neck in the middle of an unknown alley to continue to suffocate with each other tongues. Langering the lack of breath, intoxicating his mind at the point that he can’t properly recall how they even started to grind against each other.

Their hips roughly rolled together and the shivers would have brought him to continue the kiss if the chatting of passerby didn’t ring his bell of moral rules; he opened his eyes a moment on the raven locks before he noticed what was melting in his stretched hand.  
Right, ice cream.

They were supposed to go into town but Shelly ditched him to go see old friends instead of making him a visit, at Sharon’s insistence, and Kyle was trapped with her ‘kind’ brother who proposed to do the tour.  
Maybe he should have see it coming.  
He should have. Because he had noticed the glances during lunch - himself guilty for some but it was simple curiosity. He almost assumed the few brushes of legs if they hadn’t been sitting right in front of each other without a lot of space because of Randy’s wide stretched legs and, maybe, he should have not laugh at some of his words. Possibly he should have followed Shelly’s clear request to be awfully nice to his brother but not friendly.

Not that sucking on each other tongues was a thing friend would do.  
Especially when they met for the first time.  
But their precedent interactions should have made him realize what would transpire from their long stares or discreet yet bright small smiles. His instinct had indicated that he would lose if they ever ended alone together, unfortunately butterflies and blushes hadn’t been enough warnings.

Kyle gasped for air, almost getting a full inhale before sweet lips caressed his to travel to his neck. The situation was only getting worse, or better that just depends which side of his brain he wanted to listen to. His back arched a bit at the arms hugging him closer than before or simply shouldn’t.  
“Wait— no,” he managed to breath before he was shut down by the contemplative look Stan greeted him with. “Ice cream,” his lips timidly whispered.

He followed the movement of his ocean pupils, never leaving the two virid sparkling in front of him. A small exhale broke the small resolution the redhead just made about not letting his lips touch his again.  
Trying to push him - enough for their heartbeats to not echo inside each other - and at least he got Stan to glance at his hand slightly covered with ice cream when Kyle brought it next to his head.

“Oh,” he acknowledged it with a husky voice, almost bringing a roll of eyes from the other if it wasn’t weirdly sublime. “It already melted a bit.”  
Kyle also wanted him to maybe point out the real problem but wasn’t exactly in position to talk because he was trapped in his arms, but he managed to put some space between them after he left Stan’s neck to put his hand firmly on his shoulder. Stan didn’t seem to catch on because he immediately went to kiss his lips.

“N-No!” He hurried with wide eyes, “seriously?”  
This time, the brother let him increase the distance to breath and one of his arm slightly slipped off but that didn’t change a lot of his presence since the other one was still firmly holding him; the ginger assumed that he was just trying to get a look at his own ice cream.  
Kyle glanced back to his own hand when he felt one more drop on his hand. “Oh fuck—” Almost pushing him enough for him to get out of the proximity, he managed to get access to his hand to swear at the sticky sweet and tried to control the damage by licking the menacing drops.  
His lips were almost about to insult Stan for this mess. He was sure that he wasn’t the one who had started this make out - but he didn’t get the time to start his accusations because a tongue licked his vanilla flavored lips, soon trying to get another full contact.  
Kyle called him yet muffled and pushed him off, “you have to stop that!”

He blinked at his irritation. “But— you licked and it was so hot I-“

“No!” He cried out, not believing into the genuine surprised look on Stan, “you can’t say that or— or even think that!”  
He made his way out of his arms, again, to walk toward the other side of the alley to try to find some way to get out of here and far from Shelly’s brother.

“Wait! Wait a second,” Stan called and swiftly jogged at his side to grab his arm. “I’m sorry I didn’t want to embarass you,” he pleaded not stopping at his wide green incredulous eyes, “you— I mean you kept doing this, uhm, sexy flirt.”

“The what now?” Kyle inquired pushing him with his trapped arm which he didn’t get out of his grasp. He couldn’t understand why he couldn’t just act like nothing happened; for God’s sake they had a weird moment and that has to stay as a short feverish moment.  
“I didn’t do anything, you were the one kissing me,” he muttered cheeks pinkish at the fresh memory, “I never wanted that.”

“W-” He opened and closed his mouth multiple times without any sound before his tongue peeked out to clear the way for his words, “I didn’t start it first.”  
His mumbling didn’t make the redhead lower his glare but he quickly returned it with a profound scowl.  
“You brought me here!”

“I didn’t! You insisted on showing me the town and the only thing I asked for was ice cream,” he retorted back as he realized the time the sweet had passed without being eaten. Glancing at it without finding his previous envy to eat, he guessed he will throw it away.

“What? Then why were you always licking and biting your lips if that’s not to charm me,” Stan questioned with lost eyes before he muffled a small swear when he realized that his hand was also covered of chocolate ice cream.

Kyle stopped on his thoughts to hear what he had just said. “You are crazy,” he accused and would also tell the same thing to himself when he realized that his body heated at the idea that his nervous habit made him imagine that.  
“Of course I would do that!” He embarrassingly exclaimed, “I am stressed! This whole day was stressing me out because I was meeting Shelly’s parents.”  
As if he didn’t just digest what might be his fault, he nibbled on his bottom lip but realized that error when Stan’s eyes immediately glanced at them.  
“Since I am her boyfriend. Of your big sister’s,” he articulated with an accusing glare, trying to show his teeth to somehow scare him. “You do that with every guy she dates?”  
That was a cruel idea but at least he would understand why she hates him that much, since he had been himself trapped by his good looks and warm aura.

“Oh my God,” he grimaced with a nervous chuckle, “are you crazy?! I would never do that!”  
They stared at each other, both ice cream far from going to be eaten starting to stain the ground; when he didn’t continue his explanations or try to argument it, Kyle crushed his ice cream against a wall, fully throwing daggers at his half-baked innocence as he shook his hand.  
“Whu- I swear, the only guy I kissed was in high school and that was just a weird experien-”

“I don’t need to hear that!” The redhead sputtered and threw his hands in the air at how ridiculous this moment is. “Seriously just— I’m going back to find Shelly.”

“Wait no, no— no Kyle,” Stan pressed grabbing one of his wrist with his free hand, “you can’t be dating my sister,” he tightened his lips when Kyle’s eyebrows rose, “like she is horrible. You-you can’t seriously think the opposite.”

“I never thought that your point of view was important— and let me go,” he growled and retrieved his hand with a sharp movement. “You fucking kissed me when I’m dating her and she is the horrible one?”

“Okay, seriously, you kissed me.”

“Can’t you just accept that you started?” He accused.

The ravenhead frowned and his jaw tensed before he let a faint smile - almost sly - appear, “if that’s the case then you continued— I’m not the one who started to caress my hair and wrapped his arms behind my neck,” he softly retorted with a small tease.

Kyle bite the inside of his cheek, trying to control the flush creeping from the back of his neck.  
“Like you didn’t do the same,” he spat with the envy to punch his pretty face, “I’m not the one who grabbed my ass.”

He was glad that shut him up and brought almost the same fire on his cheeks when he had openly complimented his back before lunch.  
“O-okay, that’s seriously not fair,” Stan exhaled, pausing as he was troubled by the cheeky grin on the other’s face, “don’t— don’t smile like that.”

He hadn’t realized his mouth had showed his huge pleasure at having the last word, burying it deep down under his rational thoughts even more when he should actually be angry; at his surprise or own lack of awareness his internal conflict of lack of anger was shut down by lips with a faint taste of chocolate.  
Kyle tried to push back but found himself melting in the kiss when a hand slipped in his, not so much now, combed hair.

Their bodies returned against each other when their tongues touched as they seeked for more attention. His hair were stroke and it brought him the need to do the same but he had to suppress that urge when another hand went to caress the end of his back. Almost asking for more he crushed back their lips together more than glad that he hadn’t left the alley before.

It didn’t bother him to feel Stan’s shivers against his lips when he grabbed his hips to close the distance of their crotches; he was close to throw his conscience out of the window and share the fevery lust in his body, except that the reality hit him right back in the throat when he blinked to see the soft grunt escaping from Stan. The presence of another boner against his also made him call back his brain to contain the damage.

“Stop!” He gasped before a tongue caressed his neck, immediately bringing up his hands to the ravenhead shoulders to separate them he struggled to fight back the blushing he got from Stan’s happy and sloppy smile. “We need to stop,” his lips breathed with a shaky resolution.

“Why?” His make-out partner pleaded with irresistible sparks in the depth of his blue eyes. “You seriously can’t— Kyle you can’t be with someone like her.”

Kyle realized he was definitely the worst boyfriend ever and firmly broke any form of contact, with a small difficulty at getting Stan’s hand off his ass.  
“I am with her.”  
He filled his lungs before he stepped back to make clear that there wouldn’t be any other brush of skins. Though there was another surprising one when Stan quickly grabbed his arm to bring him against him.  
“Don’t make me punch you,” he warned at the surprising strength he had just used.

His firm tone worked by the confusion blooming on his face but it quickly melted into a simple sorry. “You, uhm, almost stepped into the ice cream,” he lowly explained, very close to his face before he let go when Kyle glanced down to notice the chocolate sweet on the ground.

“Right, sorry,” he softly uttered, soon getting out of his grasp and avoided to step in it. His kindness had calmed him down which made him feel worse because he should - has to - be angry at what just happened.  
“Can we,” Kyle paused to have a confident breath, “like forget about it? It was just a— uh, really wrong and weird thing and there is no need to talk about it now or ever.” His small chuckle brought a confused sound from Stan’s throat.

“I don’t think it was— wrong,” he retorted, “I would have never done it with anybody li-”

“Yeah, better to do it with your sister’s boyfriend.”

“Okay, seriously? I can’t understand why you would be with her!” Stan loudly exclaimed while Kyle looked away crossing his arms. “I mean I-I don’t really know you but I mean in two hours I can see that you are a great guy, not someone who should be with her.”

“That’s— really rude,” the redhead replied with a forced grimace, “honestly, I don’t need your approval. I’m going to walk back and hopefully find Shelly.”

“Wait, okay,” he sighed and passed a hand through his dark hair before he quietly followed him walking away, “I’m sorry, I will walk you back...”

The boyfriend didn’t bother to answer, trying to recall where they came from to not have the need to ask him, but his attempt to clear his head on the way brought only more guilt and the itching feeling that he just made out with Shelly’s little brother. A heavy weight crushed his conscience.  
Now he guessed he was one of those horrible cheater. He might as well do it with her father to die on the spot because of the shame.

Though, when he saw Randy again Kyle knew he would not even be able to touch his hand one more time.

“Is Shelly not back yet?” The ginger inquired without letting his voice crack in impatience since he could feel Stan’s presence still behind him.

“I guess she is still catching up with her friends,” Sharon supposed with a warm smile that he couldn’t not return without feeling terrible about it.

“Right,” he sighed, “I, hum, will call her. I’m sorry I still have work for tomorrow so I need to go home.”

“Of course,” she exclaimed and stood up from the garden bench she had been on with her husband, “do you maybe want a coffee to wait?”

“No, no, thank you it’s alright, I’m sure it will be quick,” Kyle forced a smile as he turned toward the coat rack and had to step to the side to not bump into Stan. He ignored his staring to grab his phone from his vest pocket, pointing the top of the stairs he politely smiled at Sharon, “can I call in the bathroom? I also have to make some calls.”  
His explanation granted an approving sign of hand from her and he thanked her with a nod while he avoided any glimpse of their son.

Not soon after he had asked Shelly to quickly show up because he needs to leave, and not to get away from her brother—he, well, met Stan again.  
More particularly his mouth.

Kyle couldn’t believe that this time it went slower, he had appeared sincere and curious about Shelly’s whereabouts; then they had held their gazes in the middle of the bathroom before an incomprehensible chuckle born between them two.  
Next thing to happen was sweet words from Stan that the redhead couldn’t understand where they came from. They seemed real even when it was to question more about how he could want to date his sister.

Not that they were really talking by gasping on each other mouth against the sink and he would honestly be without any reply about Shelly even if he wasn’t sucking on her brother’s neck.  
Kyle wasn’t sure how his moral rules got shut down, maybe because of the pleasure or that he couldn’t really remember when he found a scent or eyes this appealing.  
That shouldn’t matter, his own urge to succumb should not weigh more than his moral codes but this didn’t change that he fully returned each muffled moans or the envy to trace every inches of their skins with wandering hands.  
Kyle found himself ready to live in the bathroom, fully giving up on walking out there without letting a clear taste of him on Stan and himself without a trace of his musk.

His senses shut down the rest of his body which tried to counter the pleasure when they fumbled with each other belts. Kyle realized that he regretted his loose jogging from before but then that would mean he had imagined to jack off together before, which wasn’t the case.  
He would never be this kind of person, not the type going to cheat on their partner. Even now it was just going to be a weird dream that he will never think about it as they won’t meet each other again, and he will count on that part.

The redhead managed to get Stan to concentrate on something else than their dicks rubbing together with a hand in his black hair to look at him. Stan fully staring at him with a soft smile on, breathed against his probably red lips, “yeah?”

Kyle briefly let his head tilt backwards when a deep moan almost came from his throat, tightening his lips and resolution he glanced at him, even if he was sure that his eyes weren’t in the clearest state. “We can’t— cum into our hands,” he articulated as his hand on the top of their members softly squeezed.

Stan cleared his throat after he grunted at the contact. “Maybe I can suck you-”

“What?” Kyle froze in surprise before he realized the wide grin on his smug face, “fu-”

“Seriously,” he seductively insisted and leant for a kiss but was quickly stopped when his hair were pulled back after the ginger added his second hand at the back of his head.

“You can’t make things worse, just-just grab toilet paper,” he requested with burning cheeks letting his hands melt into a soft grip on his dark locks. His attempt to have a firm tone was just to cover that the temptation was huge. “Shelly is going to be here in no long,” he insisted.

“Don’t-” Her brother frowned and quickly grimaced, “don’t talk about her.”

“Okay let’s just sto-”  
His hands tightened when a firm hand recovered back their hardened cocks to stroke them at a fast speed. Arching his back he furiously bite down his lip to repress another sob of pleasure before he tried to glare but got no chance from the pleased and hot Stan.

He kissed him, not sure if it was only to choke their little moans or the pleadings for more. As now they were almost clinging on the sink their movements were frantics and teritorial for the bites on their lips. They were at the edge of their excitation, trying to release what they had built during the day through wanted, or unwanted flirt.

Kyle was adding one of his hand on the top of his to increase the frictions and pleasure, while Stan tried to grab with his free hand something close to toilet paper but by the sound he only bumped into what was on the sink.  
Though he must have get something because his hips started to thrust against their hands, luckily his other hand arrived just in time to not have their semens on their clothes. Kyle had blacked out, at his relief, when they most likely moaned inside each other mouths; he didn’t wish any memories from that moment, or day.  
Stan’s head settled on the small of his neck, breathing the release against his tingly skin. Kyle also relaxed his eyes half-closed to not fully recognize where he was but the scattering of kisses brought him to brutally fall back in the reality; where he masturbated with his girlfriend’s brother.

“I love your smell,” the ravenhead confessed softly nipping his cooling skin.

He choked a pleased sigh to understand what he did and push him off, barely working out because his body was still thrilling. The other had to grab on the edge of the sink to not lean backward.  
“Get off of me,” he asked with a profound breath to be fill with something else than the fall from his cloud nine. “Hurry.” His teeth tightened with an exaggerated angry noise.

Kyle was relieved to feel the weight leaving but not completely which made him glare at the facing ravenhead. He felt horribly guilty and at this point he would gladly go in front of a judge to confess of what happened. There was nothing he could deny.  
His girlfriend’s brother bored into him making him uncomfortable and torn between pushing him off to get out of here or kiss him again. It was successfully done by Stan who softly pressed back against him, gathering a lot of unclear words behind each brush of lips and curls of hair caressed.  
And he fully returned every bit even when he was called by a familiar girl voice.


	2. This doesn't spark of joy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because this cursed AU apparently needs more

The soft buzz of the lift almost put him back to sleep; if it wasn’t for his massive headache and the chatter directed at him but barely making sense to him.

“Masturbating isn’t that big of a deal. Everyone does it alone and that’s not cheating,” the blonde explained over his coffee to-go, staring at the numbers passing on the screen of the elevator, “I can’t see why you are feeling that bad— you are both twenty four, adults, it’s just two dicks rubbing against each other. Geez, you didn’t kill puppies with them.”

“Oh my God,” he cringed and glared at her, which she returned with a side-glance, “can you not talk about it? If someone hears I’m better dead than breathing and— shut up Bebe, or I’m going to burn your apartment.”

“Yeah, that would make you feel better,” she scoffed, though she patted his forearm with what must be affection, letting her palm stays on it, “but I honestly think what I said, you are torturing yourself for nothing, you aren’t even going to see him again.”

“Urgh, I hope so,” Kyle muttered as he sipped his own coffee. “If your path cross I will jump under the first car I see.”

“That’s radical. Isn’t he cute?” Her colleague commented with a small curious pout, “is your shame really about making out with Shelly’s brother or that he is ugly?”

The redhead quickly glanced back at the elevator’s doors, pretty sure that she could read the answer on his face he sighed after a small roll of eyes. “No.”  
His nerves took a hit at her noisy exclamation. “You are seriously not helping me. I feel like shit.”

“Probably because of your hungover.”

“Why did we drink again? When we have work at eight in the morning?”

Bebe responded with a hum and must have finished her coffee by the way she let her hand holding it fall against her tight.  
“I think that’s because we went to see that Sonic movie. Before for courage and after to forget.”

“Still can’t believe you actually went with me,” he confessed since at first it was just a joke, until everything became too real when they left the cinema.

“Like I said, we drank.” She insisted as she straightened herself at the view of their floor getting close, “plus you needed to get everything out, it’s always easier with tequila.”

“Telling you doesn’t mean bringing that up every time there is a freaking silence. What do I do if someone hears it?”

“You tell them the truth, it wasn’t an accident since sucking someone’s tongue can’t be a mistake.”

“Bebe,” Kyle groaned embarrassed, ignoring her small comment about ‘at least it wasn’t his dick’. He was suddenly relieved that they came a bit late so there was no one else in the elevator, “if, if— it wasn’t an accident then it was a fucking attack. You know I would never cheat.”

“Yeah, yeah. Who started to kiss, him? As if you didn’t kiss him after, so you are also guilty.”

“I know that I’m— I am also in the wrong. I just never started it, that’s important and I wasn’t going to punch Shelly’s brother the first time I meet him.”

“Always believed you will more use your tongue for talking instead of kissing but continue to deny that you loved it and wanted it,” she playfully inquired with a smirk before she rolled her eyes at his glare.  
The man whistled a sharp sound between his teeths to not grumble like a kid. Their floor was almost here and he knows he would never like to continue after stepping out.  
“Why didn’t you two talk after that?”

“I— tried.”  
He felt the heavy silence at her lack of response, much more when she must have understood why it didn’t happen with his shy tone.  
“I mean, he did it on purpose, maybe just to piss off Shelly I— I don’t know but I never want to meet him again, or hear about him. He kissed me first, using some old flirty ‘I brush your lips because you have something on them when I just want to really be close to you’ and he is hot, smells nice, alright,” he conceded, “my brain decided to shut down because he was great but.”  
Admitting that hurt more than he expected, but lying would be the same, and his point of view was objective. Stan looked like one of the actor for some soft yet thrilling romance, possibly during university or just before the lovers’ thirties.  
Fuck, I am less than thirty.

“Wait, what did you again have on your lips? Drol?” The blonde fake-perplexedly questioned stepping out of the elevator after the doors fully opened.

“Ice cream,” he specified breathing in the usual clean and cool air of the office, “I still can’t figure out if I really had something though.”

“Woah, you fell for that? Maybe you do miss boys.” She suggested while throwing her empty coffee in a bin with one hand and tousling her hair with the other to give them more volume. “Or you just really like him.”

“I don’t,” Kyle argued trying to not show his grumpiness on his face when they arrived next to the first desks. “Neither.”

He was glad, should actually acknowledge it out loud maybe, that Bebe knows when to keep a subject for private space. She was good at not transpiring any words told a second before. Talk about witnessing an orgy or confess about dealing exotics turtles with purple hats, the girl would always greet a passerby like she hadn’t heard anything weird.  
The redhead attempted to greet the same way as her, freshly. But he was lacking of energy to hide his tiredness and his hungover. The latter being the most important he did his best when he greeted their colleagues.

Aware that it would be one of his slow day, he didn’t urge his laptop to turn on when he usually assault it until his home screen appear. The coffee sank inside of him, warming his mood and throat. Kyle really wanted for the office to stop making the air conditioning that strong when he - and a few too - had fallen ill because of that, his throat was always itching inside.

“What does that Stan do?” Bebe pipped behind the screen of her computer at the opposite of him since their desks were against each other. “As a job. Not with dicks,” she whispered the last part with amusement which he bluntly ignored by returning his attention on his waking up laptop.

“Tattoos,” he answered before he wrinkled his nose, “I think.”

“Maybe you have a tattoo kink.”

“I didn’t see if he had one,” he grumbled as he threw his empty cardboard cup. “Why do you ask?”  
His curiosity was always stronger than his conscience trying to not care.

“Just curious if he was like Shelly or not.”

“Nah,” he scoffed and tried to not laugh, “he seems to have a stable job.”

By the tapping from her desk, Kyle could let himself focus without waiting another words. He shuffled through papers and post-it notes about what articles he needs to finish or what kind of research or scoops was waiting for him; briefly waving at the passing colleagues even exchanging small talks when he was so crisped a beat ago. Coffee really cheers up.

“Is that him?” Looking at his blonde friend to deeply frown at the screen she turned toward him, allowing a clear view on an instagram page. “If that’s him I get why would you would jump on him in an alley.”

His piercing pupils glanced away from the simple picture of the page over others of tattoos, which was the Stan without a doubt; crushing his lips into a tense grimace he exhaled a swear.  
“Why do you— Why do you need to research him?” He hissed.

“I wanted to know who proposed you a blowjob on the first date,” Bebe explained, melting her innocent aura into a mischievous when he widened. “Great catch.”

“Bebe! Not here,” he snarled and started to fear that she wanted him to beg for mercy. She is the public humiliating type. “Don’t freaking talk that loud.”

“Geez, no one is hearing us.” She deepened herself in her seat and must scroll through the page. “He does great stuff, did you look at it?”

“No. Because there is no reason to.”  
Her hum didn’t please him.  
He chose to change the subject to stop her from absorbing informations that he didn’t - and won’t - want to hear about.  
“I’m eating lunch with Davíd today, I don’t think I would return to the office after.”

“Oh, Davíd? Your ex?” She playfully asked. That interested her and even if it wasn’t the best way, it eased him up. “You really are not missing guys, Kyle?”

“We have been friends for a year now.”

“Huh-uh, yeah, and you didn’t have a dick since months— oh wait, there was one last Thursday!” Her hand slammed her desk. 

Kyle widened at her sudden energy.  
“Oh God, why did I even tell you about it,” he mumbled with warm cheeks as he decided that his sole and pure concentration should be on his last articles about environmental movement against marine parks.

“I always get the gossips.” She replied.

“You are sure never met him?”

“I would have remember,” Kyle confirmed, furiously munching on his rice—and his confidence didn’t come from the certitude that he would have remember such a handsome guy. “And I don’t think he had heard about me before Shelly brought me.”

“Uh, he must do that a lot then.”

“That’s what I think.”  
This fact hurt but there was no part of logic in feeling that.  
“Do you think I’m a slut, now?”

Davíd choked on his salad before he openly laughed after he breathed. “What? No!”

“I feel like one,” Kyle disgruntled, now fighting his pinkish fish and avoiding his warm eyes. “Like I’m dirty.”

“It was nice, no?” His friend ignored his accusing glare. His cheeks must show what he had really feel. “You would have break his nose if you hadn’t wanted to kiss him so you must have like it— a bit. No need to feel bad.”

“Oh my God, why are you telling me that as if it’s not cheating!” He barked back not caring if people curiously glanced at them. 

“That’s— well,” the tanned man paused with a uncomfortable wave of hand, “like, depends on a lot of stuff. I mean there is people not caring about that stuff if it’s with the same gender.”

“Bullshit. If you are trying to make me feel better it doesn’t work.” He half-heartedly glared, instantly feeling bad when he realized that he pointed him with his knife. “You could at least end me with the truth. That I’m some kind of slut.”

“I’m not going to kill you in my favorite restaurant.”  
Kyle rolled his eyes but allowed a small smile since he believed Davíd was genuinely trying to make him feel better.  
“You overreact and aren’t going to see him anytime soon, even if he works in the city.”

“Yeah and luckily he isn’t in my area so I count on never seeing him again.”

A small vibration cut his thoughts almost getting out to be shared and he promptly took out his phone to check, expecting a call from work at this time. He slightly frowned at Shelly’s name.

“Who is it?”

“Shelly,” the redhead sighed and licked his lips before picking up. “Hi, what’s up?”

“Kyle, we have a dinner tonight,” she bluntly said without any ounce of happiness.

“What do you mean?” He widened a bit, taken aback by the news and he started to stab the rest of his fish while his friend continued to slowly eat and watch. “I have a lot of work to do, I can’t go out tonight.”

“It’s going to be short! It’s one of my cousin who just got engaged and invited me to a congratulating dinner tonight, which means I can’t go without my boyfriend.”

“Why would they do that before the wedding,” Kyle groaned feeling that there was no escape except never showing up but that would quickly backfire against him. “Can’t you just tell them that I can’t?”

“How lame would that be. They want to meet my boyfriend so you have to come.”

Burying a sigh as he passed a hand in his hair, a small grimace perked up, “how did they heard about m- wait is your parents coming?”  
That would be the worst scenario; also a bit forcing since he saw them a few days ago which was enough without mentioning the second Marsh’s child.

“No, it’s just cousins but like she said there will be just me and Sarah from the family.”

Maybe he will really find a way to escape.  
“Then you don’t need me, keep that between close family.”

“I swear if you don’t come I will call Sheila.”

Her tone was so aggressive that Kyle’s heart almost stopped in fear. David also heard it by the way he paused his munching to stare widely at him, offering a small confused and worried feeling.

“Don’t call my mum,” he quietly articulated, not embarrassed that his hispanic friend could hear his small plead but enough to not openly warn her.

“I will if you don’t come.”

“Fuck, seriously? Shelly I have w-”

“I could call her right now.” She continued with a half-hidden smirking tone, aware that she got him. “Kyle?”

“Text me the time and place,” he conceded clutching his small anger between his lips. Even if she was possibly going to tell it now by the phone, Kyle promptly hung up and threw it on the table.

“You okay?” He got his response by the lack of life in his green pupils. “She would really call your mother?”

“I’m not going to let her try,” the redhead mumbled, feeling sick.

“What is it? You have to see her family again?”

“No, some kind of dinner with her cousins but there won’t be his parents,” he paused staring at the fish, “and not his brother.”

“That’s good then,” his friend tried to smile but Kyle couldn’t help but deepen his small grimace, he silently refilled their glasses with wine. “You can find an excuse to leave before dessert. I can call and act as your boss,” he proposed.

He snorted before he smiled, feeling a little better at his idea, “I think I will ask you to do it if I stay more than an hour. Or I just run away when I go to the toilet.”

“I don’t think that’s stealth. But try I would be impressed.” They exchanged grins. “And at least Shelly isn’t dragging you every day somewhere.”

“Honestly,” he dramatically sighed which brought a small smile from David, “as long as I don’t see Stan again I would agree to meet every person of her family,” Kyle joked not thinking a second that karma will bite him in the ass.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Im ashamed


	3. Karma is a bitch

At this exact moment, blue eyes became his inner nightmare.

Kyle had immediately recognized them when he stepped in the restaurant.  
Shelly was against his arm, all sparkling with makeup and excitement about the small celebration—that should get his attention to at least reciprocate her pleasure but no.  
No, it seemed that the only thing worth his attention was him, staring from the half-occupied table with dark eyes.  
The lighting was cursed; at the good position to bring in the light the fine shape of his jawline and the discret sparkles in his deep pupils.  
He was on him, the redhead guessed it by the small smile appearing on him when they hold gaze for not even a second, or maybe it was the treacherous goosebumps.

Swallowing his tumult of butterflies he turned toward Shelly.  
“I forgot something in the car,” he managed to say barely getting his eyes off of the ravenhead.

“No, you didn’t,” his girlfriend replied with a light but firm tone before she dragged him with her to one of the girl leaving the table to greet her. Kyle could fight back, sure that with his age now he won’t ridiculously lose, but he felt his skin tense more and immediately his muscles decided to dig into his only anchor.

Shelly didn’t look like she minded, happily greeting her cousin before Kyle was presented.

“Nice to meet you Kyle! I’m May, the newly engageeed,” she excitedly announced, glancing briefly at the other man at the table who must be her fiancé by the small laugh. The ginger smiled at her but he wasn’t sure if he was convincing enough to not show how uncomfortable he is.

“Congrats,” he simply stated with the feeling of his throat ready to betray him.

“Why the fuck are you here, turd?” The Marsh oldest child spoke with a strong displeasure at this discovery. There he was—finely dressed with a summer shirt and brushed hair.

Her brother didn’t even stand up from his chair but he did discreetly share the small hate.  
“It’s a cousin event?” He retorted - almost with a duh - but his eyes betrayed him when they glanced at Kyle.

“The fuck,” she growled at her cousin who ignored the animosity and made a sign for the last guests to sit at the free chairs.

One hour.  
“Hi Kyle,” Shelly’s brother sheepishly appealed.  
_Fuck_.

“Hi Stan.”  
_Just one fucking hour._

He tried to not give any of his attention to him. He greeted the other guests but the vicious guilt was already crushing his lungs, reminding him how he had passed his time with Stan.  
Luckily, the square table allowed him to not sit in front of him—avoiding any possible brush of legs or direct eye-contact. Still, Kyle immediately ordered a strong drink to break his anxiety and discomfort.

Stan kept looking at him time to time, even when he was talking to Sara, another cousin sitting in front of the redhead. If Kyle didn’t see it in the corner of his eyes, cursing himself at the same time for keeping an eye for that; he would still have the burning sensation all over him.  
Almost heart threatening those discreet glances, they actually charged him with more shady envy.  
It was present on the edge of his skin, reminding what they did and how Stan keep checking on him as if he would break and finally do or say something to him.

The starters weren’t even here when Kyle couldn’t correctly follow the conversation without having the need to smash Stan’s pretty face.  
He didn’t even recall what he had ordered. His stomach hoped for something to kill the furious butterflies because the alcohol was only burning them a bit.

“So what do you do, Kyle?” May’s future husband spoke, possibly in distress to cut the only girl-talk. He seemed nice so he smiled. It would have been a real one if Stan wasn’t just sitting next to him, who quickly looked - if he wasn’t before - at Kyle like a child would do running in front of someone to get some of their attention. He was as a puppy.

“I’m a reporter, from the main journal of the city but also have a kind of a blog. It’s just about things I researched but can’t be published in the newspaper.”  
He could talk business. At least his mind would focus on something else.

“That’s cool, when did you start that?”

“During university.”

“Yeah, Kyle is really smart,” Shelly praised and her hand landed on his. He gulped down the rest of his glass after he smiled to her.

Maybe he should drink until he is sick. Or just throw up the lava boiling everytime he failed to not look at Stan.

“That’s boring. We want the love story! Since when are you guys together?” Sara gushed with an approving nod from the last girl.

“Almost four months,” his girlfriend replied while he couldn’t remember that.

“You said three last week,” her brother corrected before a violent thud cut him with a painful grimace.

“Yeah, because we weren’t two weeks from your anniversary,” she hissed at him.  
Her kicks were almost lethal, painful enough for Stan to try to ease it with a hand.

“Can you two not bicker before the bill?”

“I don’t know, maybe you shouldn’t have invited him.”

“You two have to stop fighting, we are adults.”

They both seemed ready to say the contrary about each other but the waiter arrived with plates. The table stayed quiet until the last one arrived and Kyle quickly asked for cold water.  
He could possibly choke on his dish, it wouldn’t be the best way to escape but still.

The engaged couple began to tell what they plan for the early summer wedding, after passing on every details of his proposal.  
It was sappy but the redhead guessed that he would also like to find a ring inside his favorite book; where there would be a simple ‘turn around’ graciously written on a page and then you would turn and face the question.  
He was bored, eating his plate with the eager to leave and drinking way too cold water to hide his small distress at the bump of his shoes against Stan’s.  
Kyle was sure of the provenance since they both quickly peered at each other, no explanation needed for what has to be an accident. He returned to his girlfriend with a smile but his foot didn’t move.

The table was too small for his comfort, if it wasn’t for proper behavior all of their legs would hit and get tangled. But now, he found none of his energy to hide back his legs.

“We met through a friend throwing a small party for moving into her own apartment, we clicked and the next thing that happen is Kyle bringing me to this fancy restaurant where you can see the whole city,” Shelly exaggerated on the description, “he searched me with flowers— he was so cute and romantic when we watched the dawn.”

“Oh my god that’s sweet! I would have never guessed you were a romantic,” Sara exclaimed smiling brightly at Kyle who was hardly not biting on his tongue now.

“Yeah,” he cleared his throat smiling a bit to her, “I’m a romantic…”

Kyle was maybe a romantic but not that cheesy and embarrassing. What the fuck was that first date. And why the _fuck_ was his ankle against Stan’s.

The fresh glass of water didn’t dissipate his burning cheeks. Maybe he should have splashed it in his face.  
When the next plates arrived it was quicker than before at his relief but he still hadn’t an appropriate excuse to leave after it.

He angrily stabbed his pasta, ignoring the small remark May made about their menu where they should put an alternative for people not eating meat and more; Stan was a bit embarrassed since he was the source of her idea and insisted that if he would be the only he would adapt himself.  
His ankle brushed a little more up Kyle’s own but it quickly settled down. The observant redhead wasn’t sure if his cute slightly flushed cheeks were from his cousin’s attention or their constant touch.

Gulping down the rest of the water, he had to face that he will attend the wedding too when Shelly’s cousins insisted that he is more than welcomed.

“Anyway, where does your accent come from?”

“Ah, Jersey. Is it noticeable?” Kyle wondered, feeling more like he was munching his tongue.

One of them was restarting to caress the other up—this time using the shin, none admitting who started. He didn’t want to know.

“Not that much, depends on the words I guess.”

“You should hear him angry,” Shelly specified with amusement and her boyfriend forced a chuckle to not kick Stan.  
He had saw him smiling away with a wide shy grin.

His stomach felt so empty. Even when he had pressed himself to rapidly eat it tasted like simple air. He couldn't breathe.  
The sensations surrounding his intestines were possibly the reason why he was still hungry. Not admitting for what, his gaze locked with Stan’s cerulean while the girls chatted about what colors of dresses or themes should the wedding be.  
Kyle wanted to propose ocean blue.

His phone cut him out of their silent exchange and he almost made it fall when he tried to reach it too fast in his light jacket.  
Shelly questioned him with an eyebrow and he genuinely smiled.  
“It’s from work, I have to take it.” He didn’t wait for her approval, but she forcefully grabbed his attention to peck on his lips before he walked out of the hot restaurant.

The soft evening wind hit him more than he expected. He gladly breathed in as he picked up.  
“Hey, do you have time?”

“Hi Ike, yeah, lot of,” he chuckled, feeling his body losing the previous stun. “What’s happening?”

“I told mom about leaving university and she freaked out— I think she is going to trap me or something,” his brother explained but his tone was mostly amused which Kyle wanted to accuse.

“Did you explain your plan?” He wondered as he looked around the parking lot to find somewhere to sit. He was planning on gaining time away from _what's inside_.  
“Like all of it?”

“I think the ‘starting my own business’ made her snap. But like what do you want me to say?”

“That you aren’t going to start without a bit of experience. Did you tell her about the internship?”

Settling down on the edge of a large empty flower pot he listened to the thinking hum of his younger brother.  
“I think I told her.”

“Okay, seriously, what did you say that made her snap?”

“I told her I was not a baby anymore.” Kyle acquiesced with small syllables. “That I had sex more times than their fingers, so I’m an adult.”

“Why would you say that?! Ike!”

“She kept saying I will always be her little boy in diapers!”

The redhead sighed, briefly looking at the sun fading away. He possibly stayed more than an hour at the dinner by now. Why was he doing the opposite of what he decides nowadays.  
“Alright, well of course she is freaking out.”

“Uh maybe,” Ike supposed, “still. She let you almost live without checking every week if you ate your vegetables or— or trying to present you to Jewish people for you to date. Why can’t she let me decide if I need to study or not? Even she tells me that I’m a genius!”

He couldn’t really disagree on that, instead he glanced at his shoes, “well, that’s true but that doesn’t mean you won’t have troubles without studying.”  
Briefly holding up the end of his jean he noticed that his socket was almost in his shoe thanks to Stan’s help.  
Heavily sighing he stood up. “Look, try to show her what you show me, even if she doesn’t understand much about computer and that shit. I will try to talk to her soon.”

“Aren’t you going to eat with them this weekend?”

“Yeah, but she will complain about you before that so I might as well call first.” Ike laughed. “I have to go now though, I’m at a dinner.”

“With Shelly?” He asked with an unsure tone.

“Yeah.” Kyle ignored the meaning behind his simple ‘huh’. “Come this weekend, it will be easier and she can’t attack both of us at the same time.”

They both exchanged giggles. “Then see you at their place, thanks Kyle.”

“See ya.” He smiled, listening to the end of the line a bit before looking at his screen.

His previous unease didn’t fully come back but the lack of distraction brought in why he didn’t want to go back in the restaurant. His body took the way toward a supplice, weirdly in a steady path.  
At least he didn’t have to text a desperate SOS to Davíd to get out of here.

The end of his neck immediately reacted at their eyes meeting back once again.  
He wanted to believe that Stan had waited his return, not because it would mean a little something but just that he also had an influence on him, like he does on Kyle’s conscience.

“What was it?” His girlfriend immediately asked watching him settling down on his chair instead of the dessert menu.

He really didn’t want anything else here.  
“I have to go, some urgent last minute work,” he explained pursing his lips into a fake apology at the disappointed look of the rest of the table. “Can’t stay for dessert, I’m afraid.”

“Are you sure? It’s really good here.”

“Really, I should jump in my car now,” he pressed already searching for his wallet in his jacket.

“We could go to the bar not far from here,” Shelly proposed obviously not addressing that to her brother.

Kyle was relieved that he won’t have to drive her back.  
“Good idea,” he added in support and they exchanged a glance before he pulled out money.

“Well yeah. Sounds good I mean Stan you have to leave too, right?” May continued.

The redhead tried to not show how surprised he was at that statement, even more when the ravenhead simply nodded and already had money in front of him that he haven’t noticed before.  
“Have to wake up early, I have an errand,” he explained but Kyle felt in his guts it was meant for him, like a prepared excuse to pass the door together.

“Urgh okay, better get drunk,” May said exchanging a questioning glance from her fiancé who visibly agreed. “You better come to our wedding!”

Kyle wasn’t sure for who it was addressed before he meet her eyes and he forced a smile.  
“Wouldn’t miss that.”  
He really wanted to when the presence of Stan came back in his mind as he stood up.

“Call me?” Shelly requested with a clear sign of ‘kiss me before leaving’.  
He met her lips briefly after a nod and grabbed his jacket, looking a second at the money he had put on the table if it’s enough for his part of the bill; he never wants to think or talk about this dinner again and especially when it just had been a forced invitation to go at a wedding.

While Stan properly said goodbye to every members except his sister, Kyle just politely waved and smiled. He wanted to know if there is an exact reason for their bad relationship but that would mean to know Stan’s side of the story.

The shadow of his scent closely followed Kyle, and he had tried to naturally jog toward the exit but couldn’t manage to not hold the door for him. Only by pure and simple politeness.  
He did ignore his thanks to firmly walk toward his car, the window for his escape and where the heavy guilt in his throat will diminish.

“Kyle!”  
He could use all of his smooth and charming tone to lure him, that won’t happen.

Still, Kyle stumbled to grab his key for his car. A hand caressed his arm to firmly grab it; an embarrasing surprised noise escaped his throat but he was quick on getting angry. 

“What?!” He barked, trying to understand how can Stan seem so soft but decisive.

They stared, the other seemed that he had been prepared for such hostility.  
“Please wait,” Stan whispered with such fondness that it’s enough to scare off the ginger’s tantrum.

“What.” He lowly growled, not wanting to leave his defensive state. “I have work.”

“I need to talk with you. Shelly didn’t want to give me your number.”

“You—“ Kyle sputtered with astonishment before he frowned. “Why would you ask for my number?”

Stan looked in his jade pupils, waited for him to acknowledge the reason with his lips. Instead, he agreed to stay silent and squeezed a bit his hand on his forearm - quickly taking it away when a nervous glare pierced him.  
“I’m sorry.”

The ginger was surprised.  
“For what?” He spat and tried to hide his pleasure.

“I— Hum, the kiss, I realized that I started it after I thought and talked about it,” Stan lowly explained.

“That’s- that’s all?” Kyle inquired before he braced himself when his brain registered the rest, “you talked about that to someone?!”

His blue eyes blinked as his lips were briefly licked and tightened. “Uh- yeah?”  
He slightly frowned at the horrified look, “it’s my closest friend! Kenny is like totally trustworthy!”

“I don’t care about that!” Almost screamed Kyle fully leaving his attempt to open his car and dangerously pointed his key toward his chest.  
“Why would you do that? It’s something we— _you_ have to forget!”

Maybe he also talked about it with his close friends but that was to _vent_. To express what he would have wanted to do if his brain didn’t shut down because of Stan's good look and appealing voice, without mentioning that good perfume still present.

“I-I couldn’t not think about it! I tried to understand what happened— how,” he finished into a confession. He seemed determined to not agree with his idea to forget about it.  
Kyle frowned and opened his car a little too stronger, almost hitting Stan with the door but that would have been great.  
“Can we talk at least!”

“There is nothing to talk about!” He replied in the same exasperated tone before he shut up when he heard clients passing the restaurant doors.

Kyle hadn’t thought about the persons inside. He breathed with his jaw tensing.  
The door of the car was bluntly shut by a hand landing on it - he glanced at Stan who made him freeze a second because of his glare. That heated his skin with an arousing spark.

“I’m serious. I want to talk.”

Their irises met, too long to be simply innocent but Kyle brushed it off with a movement of his head toward his car.  
“Get in.”

“What?”

“Get in the car, I still have to leave,” he hurried and opened his door when Stan’s hand left.  
The man didn’t wait long to follow him inside, cautiously settling in the passenger seat like it could bite him. The cushion cannot but Kyle will.

After his dark eyes wandered around in the car, they ended on the redhead figure who looked back at him.  
“Thanks.”

“I’m not going to drive you,” he quickly specified when he turned the motor on after he buckled up, licking his upper teeth behind his facade.   
The sky was almost without any shades of the sun. Clouds were stretched and tainting the sky choked with the city lights.  
“You can take the subway or something else when I arrive at my workspace.”

“You really have to work at his hour?”

He tried to be cold, stern and firm because his intestines were taking loops due to their proximity.  
Kyle _hates_ his scent.  
“Yes.” The lie didn’t turn bad.

Stan let out a small admiring 'oh' before he stayed silent during the first minutes of the ride.  
“I found some of your articles, I like them.”

“Thanks,” he simply replied.

“Your journal talks about a lot of stuff. Made me want to try books and-“

“That’s a simple blog, not a journal,” he grumbled looking at the horizon.

Stan continued not discouraged by the interruption. “I was at one of the demonstrations about animal rights, not the one you wrote about though.”

“Ah, that one— wasn’t good enough for the newspaper.”

“Really?” Kyle wasn’t sure if he was trying to look interested about him or it was genuinely true. He must have looked months back to find this one. Though, it was nothing he should acknowledge.  
“Do you do things for this kind of stuff?”

“Not really.”

“Not even for animals?”

“I... feed ducks, sometimes.”  
That sure sounds lame.  
He sighed. “What do you need to say?”

Kyle's eyes were glued on the road but his hand twitched a bit on the gearshift when he felt the blue pupils staring at him, pensive.  
“Can I— can I hold your hand?” He whispered after his tongue passed on his lips; the ginger had cautiously followed it.

“No,” he immediately answered and placed his hand on the steering wheel as a simple security.  
“Why would you do that?” He mumbled feeling that his car started to be suffocating.

“I, hm, want to.” Kyle turned on the climatisation. “I think.”

That sounded pretty convincing. He wasn’t sure what to say at how indecisive Stan was with himself but he couldn’t not share the feeling. He could guess deep down right after the question that he - maybe - would have leave his hand where Stan would have hold it. Kyle wanted to roll his eyes, but then he will need to figure out if he was annoyed at Stan's uncertainty or that he would want to do it.  
“I can still stop and make you walk,” he warned feeling a bit mean but he wasn’t feeling well either staying in this close space.

“I don’t feel bad,” Stan enunciated, “maybe a bit because— we didn’t talk about it but in the end I would have done the same.”

“The same?”

“About kissing, touching.”

Kyle felt that he furiously flushed, that Stan watched him with hawk eyes but one glance made him realize that he was also crimson; biting at the inside of his cheek he wandered his eyes on the road as he felt like they should stop the car somewhere.  
He could see in the corner of his eyes, on the streets brightened by opened places that it was only the beginning of the pre-summer night.  
“You are crazy,” he stated after his brain was working around what to say or admit.

“Did you not like it?”  
He recognized the firm, grave and husky tone, but he wasn’t sure how he could when Stan never spoke to him like that, or at least not when he has been awake.

The ginger wanted to be a smartass and reply that the answer was obvious since they both had to cum in each other hand, but that would bring back vivid memories.  
“Yes,” he articulated and his hand crashed on the gearshift, “but I feel horrible.”

“Why?”

“Stop acting like you don’t know that I date your sister!” Kyle barked, stopping the car a bit brutally at a red light. “Fuck,” he quietly growled feeling his neck burning in shame.

He wanted to scream at him, for pestering his conscience, for creating a heavy image of him as a cheater and to lure him by the simple brush of their skins—he did nothing.  
He observed Stan’s hand cautiously grabbing his on the top of the gearshift to caress it softly.

“I want to know you,” Stan admitted with an awfully demanding tone.  
“Do you... really like Shel-um, her?”

Kyle almost didn’t get the question. It was forbidden and how it barely made its way to him he considered that Stan also knew about it. He stared at the unmoving road, silently swearing for no real distraction from the soft caresses on his hand.  
He shouldn't enjoy.

“Get out,” he breathed, not sure anymore if he shouldn’t do it himself because he was starting to desperately lack of air, “please.”

The thumb on his skin didn’t stop. It continued under the appearing green light, the roar of cars and the shaky breathes.

“I’m sorry, you’re irresistible.” His passenger smoothly confided.

Kyle almost crashed in the car in front of them.

Simple survival reflexes saved them when his brain completely declared defeat to fall in the back.  
He ignored the furious honks behind them to look at Stan, also wide staring at him with pink cheeks darkening when their eyes meet.  
A side of Kyle wanted to ask. To know what he means, what part, why and how _mad_ he is but he quietly listened to the other side; more logical, more sane, more quick to act as he found himself parking the car in front of a close empty Walmart.

The world stayed silent at his decision after he turned off the car. A breath left him.  
Not daring to look at the person next to him, he couldn’t guess what he could see. A part was scared to discover.  
Stan’s hand hadn’t left his—squeezed it when Kyle had lost, for a moment, his mind but nothing else moved after that.  
He knew that he would talk at some point. Either to comment about how furiously red Kyle is or just to add something worse than before.

He felt like he was getting more and more lost when he wasn’t moving - weirdly a small caress on the back of his hand snapped his mind back into reality, looking right at the raven head who timidly returned it with curious and caring eyes.  
The butterflies in his throat decided to dive back in his stomach, officially making it their territory when their lips touched.

Kyle didn’t think he would be the one who will step over the frontier of fantasy. But he did, breaking their hands apart to grab Stan's shirt and meet him in the middle of their seats. He didn’t care about whose fault it was now.  
He could officially sign up his name to every hells without any regret as he kissed him again.

For a moment the ginger was worried because he felt no real reactions from Stan, still he continued to avidly nibble his upper lip to maybe find some switch and get something, _anything_.  
A hand brushed his hair and Kyle’s tensed muscles melted away in a small pleased smile. His head was not something he grew fond of being touched, but he allowed it as right now it had brought their mouths to open together and dove back to deepen an urge.

He was quickly drawn against him when Stan wrapped his shoulders with his other hand; only the parts of the car were sharply cutting the line between them. At least they were somewhere safe, or it felt like it.  
Kyle tried to not think about the possibility of someone passing near them and burst their small bubble. The kisses were too necessary to think a second about anything else.

Their hands were gripping each other, ignoring the obstacles inside the small space. Stan was the first to remove his belt but the other thought far ahead - doing the same but also hurriedly reclined the passenger seat.  
The ravenhead gasped, a bit startled at the sudden fall but Kyle kept his smirk to climb on him.  
A part of his head was screaming that he was starting to really be out of control, but he really wanted to stay against him.

Stan’s hands caressed his back with a lopsided smile. He would have returned it if his conscience didn’t slap him to not look too happy when it was _bad_; instead he kissed him, licked until he got the agreement to create back the lustful collision.  
His head was insanely deafining with myried of feelings. A rash opposite of the breaths and chuckles in the car, gentler and pleasing. Heavy feelings wanted to break free.  
He reclaimed more but his head always clashed against his moral part.

Why couldn’t he shut down when they were back together? Last time his brain perfectly submitted but now he can’t help but think about Shelly.  
What could happen if somehow they were discovered and, worst, how he would have to explain that.   
Kyle is a big fan of words and speeches but he lacked some vocabulary to explain why he was petting the raven locks, or hungrily enjoying a pair of hands slide under his t-shirt caressing his already shivering back.

They continued to grind against each other, now trying to be the more in contact without interruption, their mouths were barely allowing them to part to breath and even when that happened they weren’t far from a cheek or ear.  
His knee hit the brake handle making him bite down a wince. Stan hurried his hands on his ass to lift him for a second while he moved a bit to make more space for the redhead, himself groaned a bit when his thigh awkwardly banged against the door.

Not that having sex in a car was on his to-do list but Kyle found himself gleefully snort in his neck at how clumsy they were. But not enough to stop their lust.  
He cupped Stan’s face to softly kiss him back when they silently agreed on the position. Kyle tried to not put all of his weight on him but at the same time he wanted to fall against his slightly muscular chest. He had kept that in mind since the bathroom incident, though that seemed premature.  
Stan didn’t seem bothered by his position or maybe he was scared that if he complains he wouldn’t be able to clench his ass. One of his hand hesitated to stay there or travel under his t-shirt to caress his back; at some point, he was teasing the entire length of his back with tingling fingers on his spine as he continued to openly thrust out his tongue to meet Kyle’s.

The ginger deep breathed against his face, turning his head in sake for their passion.  
He was sure his saliva will have a trace of his at this point. Not enough to be a forever reminder but close.  
They were literally thirsty for whatever things they could share.

His mother would definitely not approve his tentative thrusts toward Stan’s crotch.  
Actually, Sheila’s voice was in a side of his head using the small arguments Kyle has gathered since he had first seen him. It was not making him back down.  
Imagining how his family would react and how horrified they definitely would be—he continued to breath to kiss. His boner was still trying to pierce his underwear.  
Ike would probably cheer him up with an ‘attaboy’.

His hand tried to reach the power window but he had to straighten himself to do that and so leave Stan on the lying seat; the ravenhead casually followed him up, wandering both hands under the back of his t-shirt to let him properly sat on him. After a small pleading look that produced a rush of heat on Kyle’s face - already crimson - he placed a trail of kisses on his neck. He didn’t seem ready to break their bubble.

Kyle’s fibers fluttered for Stan but managed to open a bit the window.  
“Need some air,” he mentioned staring down at the nibbling person who glanced at him, eyes shining.  
“No hickeys,” his mind pressed silently working when his body was agreeing to every caress.

“Sorry,” Stan muffled where he had started to gingerly bite, his tongue decided on his own to lick and convinced the rest back to suck the shivering neck. The shadow of Kyle must have had an impact on him because he quickly left his task to kiss his jaw.  
“Taste good.” Was his apology; and boy Kyle did forgive him fast for that.  
The ravenhead left the skin on fire, propping a bit the weight on him closer - to him or his own erection. The feeling of the ass of the panting ginger made his throat turn useless. He needed a brush of fresh air too.  
“You are so red,” he commented after a deep swallow, wandering one of his hand to his face.

That was an understatement because the ginger was sure that his skin must almost be burnt at this level of temperature.  
The exterior refreshed him, not enough to not stop the beating of his heart to resonate in his skull but he put that on the caressing hand on his cheek. His head leaned toward the soft palm.  
It would be dark if they weren’t surrounded by cold lights and the agitation of the city. Somber enough for him to continue without any second thoughts about their multiple French kisses, dying to cum dicks and stares too full of something to be told yet.

“Stan.”

The listener simply nodded, not batting his glance away, only his hand grabbing his waist behind showed a faint distress.

Kyle bit on his lips, without his head working on anything else than the sensations, he couldn’t remember that Stan had accused this habit; the man sure did remember that because his eyes travelled down to watch it before firm pale hands grabbed Stan’s marveled face and slipped in his dark hair with a soft grip.

It was a sweet, shy and treacherous kiss that he placed on the ravenhead lips. Apologies were traced after it. Never too long or too evident.  
Kyle stayed bitter at his attempts to say sorry - for being angry at him, to let that happen, to think about him, to be so horny for his face and to exchange enough saliva to keep a reminiscent of him.

At some point the unpronounced syllables became almost pleading, more important than before. They stretched out, but particularly the lips made various thank yous.  
It felt better in his head and at the tip of his tongue—thank you for smelling so good, thank you for not disappearing, thank you for asking if I liked it and a goddamn thank you for caressing me like that.

Stan had returned the innocent smooches. He followed the rhythm and cautiously watched the green irises opening at some kiss.

That was enough for Kyle to let his tongue pass on his lips and squirm against his hips at the reunion.  
They both gasped against their mouths. Locking their gazes with a raised-eyebrows-winky thing from the blue eyes and with crinkling green eyes.  
This time, the ginger grabbed the top of the laying seat, only stopping his hips to brace himself against Stan who excitedly squeezed him with eager; their kisses were growing biting and Kyle would have notice how messy they were - especially when they separated with a drizzle of saliva - if he wasn’t thinking how to get their erections closer.

He wanted to bite on Stan’s neck but that seemed unfair. He didn’t want him to do the same, only because that will leave traces of their activities. Settling with breathing in his dark hair he enjoyed the hands wandering under his t-shirt. His throat made a strangled noise in his ear when Stan rolled his crotch against his but he firmly returned the gesture with the help of his grip on the seat.

A raw and rauque moan forced Kyle to not let his lust slip out of control.  
The car wasn’t suitable for two people grinding against each other comfortably but his hips continued in small distress while Stan muffled soft grunts. Soon he firmly grabbed the redhead’s hips and straightened himself up causing a small panicked gasp from the one on top but he didn’t let him fall backwards. They quickly joined each other back in a profound embrace, holding on each other t-shirts.

“I—” Stan pensively licked his lips for a short beat before he faced him-“can I take off your shirt?”

With flushed skin, he agreed at his request but didn’t have the time to say something about his body. He lacked of exercises but never thought much unless he saw a gym, which the Marsh son must go to—it was confirmed when he swiftly took off his t-shirt after doing the same with Kyle’s.  
If the hurry didn’t make more excited the free view of his chest did. He found back the trail of dark hairs vanishing in his pants he had seen the first time. It was much more intimate and secretive now as he could pass a hand on it.  
His own hairs were more discreet, brighter but a contrast on his pale skin - though Stan possibly not cared about that - and Kyle gulped down a comment.

“Do you wear some kind of perfume?” His question was without an answer for a moment but that must be because he voiced it against his ear. He couldn’t help but always be attracted closer to him.

“No,” he grunted with an innocent hair-to-hair rub.

“Tattoos?”  
Hands were running teasingly on his sides. He tried to create the same fire-like feeling on Stan’s neck with kisses and tugging his dark locks at the base.

“Two, small,” Stan breathed after finding his ear under the mess of his fiery curls to nibble on it before he was strongly pushed down.

Kyle choked a small response but that was too short to be clear as he languishly crushed back their lips together. The only interruption was a soft moan coming from a violent shiver, Stan promptly grabbed Kyle’s hands which had miraculously got their way inside his underwear.  
The ginger shot him a surprised glance before he purposely licked his lips.  
For someone fond of words he couldn’t find the strength to really describe his envy.

He travelled down before he could say something; Kyle had to put himself on his knees before the seat to be properly able to take off what was hiding his erection. His hungry eyes followed the clear dark trail around his firm member.  
His position was perfect to have a view on his erection and to watch Stan, very flushed and with anticipating eyes, propping himself on his elbows.

A small clean freak inside of Kyle’s head almost squealed in joy at the clearly clean cock, that couldn’t be helped to be noticed but that was just the back thoughts of his real excitement—or maybe it was the smell. A quick look at the breathy ravenhead was enough to just drive him more inquired to give him a blowjob. Not that he needed any encouragements but a small part of his brain was still worrying.  
He pressed his lips against Stan’s firm erection, slowly taking it in before he went straight down to get his mouth as full as his mind.

Alarming bells were still ringing, possibly because his conscience was horrified of how quick he decided to listen to his own dick - the definitive part where his thoughts gathered now to dictate him to shut up and suck.  
He didn’t let himself be tempted to try to have the whole thing in his mouth, as puking will create traumatizing experiences for both of them but there was another part who feared to disappoint Stan.  
Which is weird since the man was fighting back amazing moans and possibly scratching his head by how his nails were deepening there. At least his curls weren’t pulled out.  
He didn’t flinch at the small spasms of his hips at that he could only continue to bring him more to the edge. A hand was at the end of Stan’s stomach curled against his black hairs but only by instinct.  
Licking the length to eagerly kiss the head, Kyle himself took more pleasure than he intended to, putting his throbbing erection on the strong scent and rauque pleading calls. He could take care of himself too since Stan’s dick was perfectly set in his mouth to not need his other hand to hold the base, but he didn’t move.

The ginger hummed back in reply to his name shamelessly moaned.  
Kyle kept the warmth presence in his mouth—trying to not disgustingly drool, bobbing his head up and down to feel the head hitting the back of the roof of his mouth.  
He briefly hollowed his cheeks when Stan warned him - if the firm spasming grip on his head with clear pleading was any sign - and he was bit proud at how quick he got him.

Quickly tightening his lips when he parted away from his dick, his senses were suddenly overwhelmed by the temperature, odor, taste and view. He urgently tried to open his car’s compartment to find a tissue, anything close to that, to spit the sperm.  
Kyle finally turned away from Stan to look at what he was doing but he was quickly helped when the passenger most likely retrieved his spirit.  
His hands hurried to find a packet of tissues and handed it, possibly aware of what the ginger needs to do, but the look on his face didn’t confirm anything else than worry.

The raw flavor stayed on his tongue even when he pushed the most out. It stickily stayed on his lips and he had to use another tissue to be totally clean.  
Kyle didn’t let his mind register the view of the wet tissue, instead he promptly glanced at Stan who was hovering him now.

“I’m sorry— hum, it’s gross?” He tried ignoring a wave of hand to shut him up.

“Yes,” he stated after a small conflict to talk or not. His body moved alone since his inside were struggling in panic. Covering the tissue with another one to be sure it wasn’t going to stain his car, he preferred to look around to find some place to put it until there is a trash can.

“Kyle,” Stan softly sussurred with pinkish lips. His hands cupped his discreetly freckled face who had only turned a bit, not ready to face him right away.  
The redhead softly wrinkled his face feeling every dust on his skin. Too awake, too conscious for being next to someone affecting him by just breathing the same air.  
“That— that was amazing,” he said with a hushed tone and by the look on his face it was a bit embarrassing to say it outloud but the silence seemed to pressure him.

But the necessity to break this feverish moment disappointed Kyle.  
His inside literally tasted wrong and this time his mind choked every sparks of excuses or pleasure, not allowing the soft fingers grazing his cheeks to bring any good at the putrid conscience.

“Can you leave now?” The request was hard to form with his voice quivering.

“What, no,” he immediately snapped but it wasn’t aggressive just simply offended. His arms trapped him by his shoulders when he understood what the ginger was trying to do—to escape or at least go back to his own seat where he must have left his sanity.  
“My turn to take care of you,” Stan implied with fondness but it irked the other.

Kyle tried to jump at the other side of the car before his shoulders were tugged up against the ravenhead who beamed with a gentle smile. He tried to put him on his laps or at least on the seat to be at the same level.  
“I don’t want your dick on my pants,” he snarled - or tried to - since his mind was still stepping out of his numbness to fall into a disgusting truth.  
Maybe his aggressive accent would scare him off, make him angry so they can be break apart.

At his irritation, Stan silently pulled back up his boxers putting the argument in it, and Kyle’s glare didn’t make him lose his smirk. As if he knew something else.  
“We need to switch or change your position.”

He didn’t need to ask why. There was still lust in his cerulean eyes and the request he made in his parent’s bathroom did stain his mind. Acknowledging it would bring what he had thought after that day and think about what his imagination playing during the night.  
“You could leave,” he proposed toneless, positive that he sounded rude.

One of his dark eyebrow lifted possibly in simple interrogation at his sudden switch. His arms pressed Kyle against his chest when he tried to wiggle out and he went to kiss his neck since his chin was stubbornly up, not allowing any possible contact.  
“Are you embarrassed?”

“F-what? No.” He replied with a profound indignation but that promptly turned into embarrassment when hands went to his ass, squishing it teasingly.  
Kyle wanted to say that he doesn’t want him to touch him and especially when he seemed so thrilled about that. But it was stuck in his throat.  
His anger against both of them, his aching uncomfortableness and guilt, that drowning pleasure and this frail unspoken thing between Stan and him. He couldn’t push all of that on being horny, even if he was frustrated he wouldn’t jump on anyone in an alley.  
Although the answer was out of his reach - willingly - it was unwanted and oddly scary because he couldn’t find a proper logic.

“Kyle,” Stan purred, seeking for his total attention.

The ginger was trying to not give in, even when he wasn’t exactly fighting back their closeness. Gentle, warm kisses were scattered, never too far and too short as if with a brave pressure they will be inked in.

Kyle’s arms slowly wrapped around his neck defying his mind screaming for self-control and decency.  
Their lips travelled back together after a slow reunion of their eyes.

He felt falling into him. Stan’s firm chest was holding him up, possibly struggling to not fall back against the stretched seat.  
His red curls were caressed slowly and with intense care. It could be the small fear that Kyle will snap that brought him to be like this.  
He returned the gesture trying to stay on the same pace. His conscience won’t make him bleed if he just returned the necessary attention.

They were still inside of his car. In the front of a closed Walmart. Miles away from the restaurant. Hiding from the outside. Out of reach of proper behaviour.  
It was a bubble in his chest he languished in the instant, probably going to be replaced by a hollow without the option of it in the future.  
He will take a cup of tea with his guilt and sudden lack of morals later.

Their tongues met with a spark that brought back his blood to pump a hot feeling under his skin.  
The previous hurry and raw tentation curled up in a corner, leaving space for more sweet tenderness that shouldn’t bloom and yet it was here since their eyes had met. As in romantic story where everything is turned upside down by just the simple view of someone if that really existed.  
He didn’t want to believe in love at first sight—that would possibly admit soulmates, true love and fairy tale ending; Kyle isn’t pessimistic, not enough to be optimistic but close, but that words sold dreams and big expectations from simple chemical reactions in your brain.

It would embarrass him to compare them with cheap overdramatic characters in a romantic movie if they weren’t actively exchanging warm saliva.  
He wasn’t saying they were lovers, far from that please. But the thing - unlabeled - between them was close to what madness people would allow for love. Now he could attribute to lust that kind of power too, he just never expected to be someone thinking with his hormones.  
Rationality and aggressive desire weren’t big friends and Kyle grew up listening closely to the logical suggestions of his brain to make important steps.  
Now he has to take a look in that joyfull new guest overstepping his mind.

His erection surprisingly quickly came back, after his consciousness had violently tackled him down with a bitter taste in his head.  
It was still firmly pressed against his underwear before a hand managed to open the layers to let it out. Kyle peered at Stan trying to not let the small panic shine in his eyes but his skin melted in the contact. He watched the blue irises soften with time as Stan’s hands gently put his pants and boxer down his hips.  
It wasn’t easy since he had been dragged on his laps—a part of him wanted to straighten up the seat to make the moment more bearable for Stan but his guts were begging him to not help him.

A hand, that had slowly passed over his trail of ginger-ish hair, wrapped around his dick.  
“I don’t need that,” he uttered with a shaky voice breaking his small facade of annoyance.

“You do,” his voice leisurely countered and the struggling one crushed his eyelashes at the shiver of his soft tone, “I want you to feel good, Kyle.”  
Except that he doesn’t want to, that would raise arguments that the events weren’t a bad idea—that maybe he wasn’t becoming a slut.  
“I can’t suck you?” His request was drawn on his jawline with teasing pecks.

His throat ached and his heart was violently trying to repulse the creeping need away. “No.”  
The refusal was only to not let another touch linger on him, he already had a handjob from him and another one won’t haunt him more than already.  
He could digest that he sucked his dick but not in the opposite way.

Stan seemed about to disagree and push his request but instead he cupped one of his cheek—pressing their lips together with a chastity that had been long gone.  
Kyle returned the feeling, pressing his arms behind his neck to be closer while Stan’s warm hand left him to travel down.

He squirmed a bit, one of his defence to not totally give in as his boner was being teased. His hand grasped his dark strands in reflex of a thumb massaging the head of his erection. It was probably a reaction he should have hidden because confident fingers were wrapped around his length now.  
His lips were left alone, without any way to muffle excited pleasure. His teeth sunken in his lower lips to not fully exhibit how Stan’s affection affected him.  
A part knew that Stan was aware and probably intended to make him melt at his envy.

His erection was stroken, not putting him at the edge yet, but close enough with his scent and the kiss drawn on his collarbone. His head had fallen on his shoulder. Gasping and gritting his teeth to not let his moans touch his skin, he tried to fight the pool of thrill at the bottom of his stomach.  
Kyle could feel himself willingly clinging on him, making them inseparable or at least feel the other all over. It’s not even like Stan could leave in that situation with a horny redhead on his laps jerking against him.  
The ravenhead kissed his neck with burning lips, tracing shivers on his collarbone and almost getting to his chest if his head wasn’t lifted up by a strong hand to get a hungry opened kiss.

A small whimper escaped Kyle even when he tried to choke against his lips; he could feel that he was wet and it had been for a while now, maybe since he climbed on him, but now he was leaking with both his lust and control.

He didn’t like how long he has been hard but that was possibly the thrill of doing something horrible like this. It irked him, very much, but yet he couldn’t help and not follow this path.  
He felt like a lustful teenager, or one of those whore on the internet. Was he one now?  
Possibly not by just cheating once but he restarted it, and deep down he had felt the future events when their eyes collided at the restaurant.

His moans were sluty, he thought, and they simply bloomed just by his voice.  
He tried to bite down a bunch of jolts when he felt fingers on his head’s dick, circling and pushing him to let go while the other hand continued along his length, gentle but strong.

“Kyle, don’t hide,” he cooed right against his flushed ear, softly blowing in it. Kyle even heard him swallow.  
“Come for me, Kyle.”

The redhead tensed, unwillingly pleading with a broken voice as he dove his nails at the back of Stan’s neck. He jerked his hips against him - trying to find the same rhythm with the ravenhead whose voice echoed throughout him causing delighting shivers.  
His eyes were shut with the fervor ambition to not have an image of releasing against Stan. Again.  
A shiver throbbed through him, overwhelming his senses, and it escaped from his throat with a guttural moan.

There were lips against his cheeks coming up to his forehead with sweetness.  
If he looked up to meet him instead of resting against his forehead it will break something in him. He sensed it because he had never been more aware of that part of him before.  
The pleasure faded away but sprinkles of caress still hold lit the warmness between them. He recognized the sound of tissue somewhere in there, his brain didn’t register how or when Stan put one on his dick.

Kyle straightened up. Firm and sharp, he created a distance holding his gaze to the small patch of seat layer between them now.  
He cleared his voice which felt inexistant without a push before words were formed on his buzzed tongue.  
“You need to get the fuck out of here.” His voice was too breathy to put anything else than syllables.

“W-Wait,” Stan mumbled before he dissolved into worries, “look at me.”

He did.

Abyssal oceans were waiting for him.  
It’s suffocating. His heart was.  
Stan was.

“You have to leave, now,” he asked after his tongue was reprimanded with a bite for sounding so weak, “I have work.”  
The justification sounded stupid now after kissing him like it was surviving.

“W-Not at ten p.m,” the ravenhead retorted incredulous after stealing a look at the hour behind Kyle.

“Yes,” he hissed starting to get sick of staying close to each other.

“But K-” His hands flew to cup his head but another pair stopped him. His eyes waited for a sign as he must know to shut his mouth, probably because he was at the end of piercing virid eyes.

“Can you— just leave,” he slowly articulated catching a grimace he wanted to throw at himself.  
This time he was free to return to his seat. Ignoring the embarrassing bump he had with the gearshift he sat down in distance of the other body, except that didn’t change a lot of things.

There was still the odor, the heat emanating from his body and the raw presence.

Kyle was faster at hiding back his nudity, a small glance made him understand that the black haired man was in his own head instead of dressing up.  
He could throw him out of the car without his t-shirt on but that would mean he will have a trace of his presence.

The ginger just kept on getting presentable for his own conscience, but he clicked his tongue like a warning as he correctly pulled up his pants.  
It’s reeking, either him or just the aggressive perfume of sex but that never bothered him that much before.

“Can I have your number?”  
His green eyes were rolled before his mouth crushed into a knot.  
“Something to contact you.”

“For what?” He mocked passing a hand in his messy hair not allowing a single glimpse of how Stan might look at him.  
“I won’t even answer you.”

“Why not? Because we are-”

“We are what.”

“I-I don’t know,” he stuttered wandering his blue eyes to Kyle and weakly hold it. “I’m not crazy there is something, right? Betwe-”

“No,” the other hissed with hurry, hiding his fear behind blank eyes, “no. There is nothing— nothing.”  
He was defying him to continue with a glare and it was briefly returned with a small ambition before Stan looked outside through his window.

“Alright,” he venomously said.

“Put your freaking shirt on now,” Kyle muttered locking his arms to hid the nervous pinch he gave to himself.  
He listened to his moves, waiting for him to get out or at least for his brain to clear out the mess in his chest - yet he is still counting on this treacherous part of him.  
“Do you have cigarettes?”

Stan stopped to move by the sound and maybe his request was trespassing the tranquility he was asking for.  
“I, hum, I don’t smoke, got a bit of asthma,” he replied with his usual tone now, “you do?”

“No,” he shook a bit his head at his reply, “just heard it’s good against stress.”

“Oh… stuff?” Stan tried and seemed a bit surprised to get Kyle to turn to see him.

Their gazes lingered.  
“Yeah.”

The lie slowly buried itself down. He turned on his car, not the motor yet but at least he was moving.  
“I can’t have your number?” The request was on repeat. Only making Kyle feeling worse.

“No,” he replied on the same polite tone, keeping a small icy bit. “Can you leave?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

He watched him putting up the seat and taking care of the hem of his t-shirt like it was a good excuse to not move.

“Stan.” His blue eyes reluctantly looked up to meet him before he frowned with his hand moving toward the door.

The hesitation was transparent.  
Kyle decided to settle on patiently waiting.  
He was painfully aware that his eyes were sharp enough to be unwaveringly uncomfortable at some point—that comes from his mother he supposed.  
Stan looked at him, hand still on the escape he kept ignoring, before he leaned toward him.

Kyle didn’t move away because he was honestly surprised by the change of plans but neither did he when he was gently kissed.  
“See you.”  
He thought for a second that he would add his name at the end.

A gulp crushed the knot in his throat as he watched the figure leaving his space.  
His head was muted for a moment. It overwhelmed his senses, creeping up his spine, trashing his good morals and stepping all over his dear logic.  
The heartbeat was drown under his memories sparkled up by the scent still here.

Starting to smoke was maybe not an insane option now. Especially not the dumbest decision of the day.  
Obviously, his guilt was going to slowly kill him so why not fasten it.

Stress was easier in university when it was just exams. Just a question of concentration and good habits, ground rules.  
Like not cheating.

[To: BB  
At 10:13 pm  
I’m a slut]

[From: BB  
At 10:13pm  
Lmao yeah me too  
that new iced tea at the cafe is making me a sluuuut]

[From: BB  
At 10:14pm  
Like is there meth in there]

[To: BB  
At 10:14pm  
I sucked a dick]

[From: BB  
At 10:14pm  
Woaaa  
You didn’t drink tea  
Whose]

[To: BB  
At 10:16pm  
Stans]

[From: BB  
At 10:17pm  
Wat  
Wtf I thought you were going to throw urself under a car]

[To: BB  
At 10:17pm  
I couldn’t  
Was driving the car]

[From: BB  
At 10:17pm  
YOUU SUCK HIM WHILE YOU WERE DRIVINF]

[To: BB  
At 10:18pm  
We stopped  
In front of a Walmart]

[From: BB  
At 10:18pm  
Omfg  
yrincredible]


	4. Dog person and cat person

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoop I am back and have many regrets

“Maybe we should write a book. First the exposition— you and your lover arriving at her parent’s house for dinner, complication her brother is hot, you too, you both want to fuck each other. Climax? You bang him.”

A huff escaped his nose. “Nobody would read that.”

“I would,” Bebe argued and he could only roll his eyes. “But listen to me, maybe it’s one of those sexual tension which will only disappear when you do it.”

“That sounds like an excuse for cheaters,” he mocked with no emotion, “you had used that?”

“No, fuck you. It’s like the list couple make— like, urh what’s the name? You know when you write down which celebrities you can have sex with.”

“Like that could happen,” Kyle scoffed with bitter on his tongue.

“That’s the point, that’s just a one time thing and you need a miracle for that.”

“How does that concern Stan?” He sighed, arching his eyebrows with tiredness.

“Maybe you just need to do it, just once and there won’t be any tension left,” Bebe explained, tapping the table with a nail at each words. “At the wedding you won’t be able to avoid him, especially when you don’t dance and will sit in a corner drinking.”

The ginger wrinkled his nose to not grimace in distress but his throat tightened at the future event.  
“I will not do anything else with him. Even more when we will be at a freaking wedding.”

“Kyle.” With reluctance, he glanced at the voice. She stared at him with an inquisitive frown. “You already sucked his dick.”  
Shutting her friend down with a move of hand, she proceeded, “you wouldn’t have done that it if you didn’t want to— I know you. You are attracted to him, you can’t lie anymore.” Her lips pursed before a tongue traced words, “if you are freaking out so much it’s because you know you will suck his dick again.”  
He slowly turned pale, tensing his shoulder with a treacherous tormented expression.  
“Honestly,” she added as a request for an answer.

Kyle wandered his attention around to search for some kind of escape subject - even if he is aware that it won’t last - but he dejectedly returned to face her.  
“Maybe— okay, yes. I had already told you that he is handsome,” he muttered as an itch grew on his neck.

“And he is sweet and nice,” she specified ignoring his ashamed eyes, “your words, not mine. That’s why I tell you that’s maybe one of those sexual tension that can only disappear by doing it or stay away, which apparently you can’t.”

“He came in my car!” He accused, “I wasn’t going to jump out of my own car,” his mind reasoned in the distress of sounding too weak. He checked his tone when he saw the waiter walking toward their table.

Kyle innocently tapped on his opened laptop to not show how the discussion made him unusually desperate. He does vent but he wouldn’t annoy a comfortable cafe like this.

“Here is your coffee and tea, fellas,” a soft blond pipped with a smile as he presented two pretty cups.

“Thanks Butters,” Bebe smiled brightly while the redhead immediately dove in his warm tea after a quick one.

“You alright, Kyle? You look tired,” the owner wondered out sheepishly concern. “Do you want a cat on your lap maybe?”

“Ah, no, thank you but I’m not there yet.”  
He glanced at one of the many cats of the cafe, splayed on one of the free seat getting belly rubs. Maybe because he grew up without any pets at home he found himself easily walking into a cafe with fluffy presences. Even more when it’s for sheltering homeless animals.  
“It’s just a headache not leaving.”

“By headache he means a hot crush,” the curly blonde enunciated as she took a picture of the latte art.

His glare was ineffective and possibly should have been for Butters who excitedly gasped.  
“A crush! That’s awesome, who is-”

“No,” Kyle cut his sparkling exclamation with a firm tone, “not a crush.”

Butters confusedly glanced at Bebe whose lips left her cup in a hurry. “They went third base the second time they met,” she solemnly informed over the ginger’s violent cough in his warm drink.

“Third base?” Butters repeated, softly frowning with curiosity that made Kyle cringe. “L-Like baseball? You played baseball with him?”

He immediately stopped the girl who was eager to elaborate.  
“Not important.”

“Look on the internet,” she slipped with an okay sign and ignored the heavy sigh. Butters left with a small and too enthusiastic nod.

“Can’t you stop talking about it?” Kyle scowled. "I can't bring you anywhere."

“I have to because you think that not talking about it will make Stan disappear.”

“Because there is nothing to talk about,” he argued putting his cup down after drinking a hot gulp. “The wedding will be the last time I will see him. End of story.”

Bebe loudly exhaled and muttered something about 'there is always a sequel'. Instead of voicing up, she settled down her phone next to her coffee. “He told you that he wants your number, maybe he really wants to know you.”

“He won’t have it, from Shelly nor me.”

“Isn’t your e-mail online? On your blog?” She elaborated and the fact made him flinch a bit.  
He silently sipped on his drink, refreshing the page he had stayed on since he had opened his laptop.  
“Kyle.” He continued to drown his throat with a far too hot beverage; at least it’s sweeter than his mood.  
“Did he send you an email?” She slowly questioned.

Pursing his lips he nervously tapped on few keys.  
He settled his nervous hands with his empty cup down. “Yeah.”

“And you weren’t going to tell me?!” She squealed and grabbed his laptop in a hurry. “What did he write?”

“Nothing,” he pressed horrified when it softly bumped her cup, small drops falling close to it. “I’m not going to show you!”

The blonde frowned at him, glancing to the screen once before she raised her eyebrows with a pursed smile. “You really want me to ask him directly?”

“You— what,” Kyle exhaled with wide eyes. “What did you do?”

“Nothing yet," she enunciated, "but remember I have his Instagram. I can go get a tattoo and start to talk about my ginger coworker with a name starting with a k.”

“Bebe,” he groaned, almost wanted to ask if she would really do that but he knew the answer, “you are the worst, seriously.”

“I’m on your side, don’t you worry,” she purred watching him go into his box mails with his finger on the pad, “ah— it’s not even erased, you are so deep in him.”

“I’m not,” he snarled, letting her free space to read the screen comfortably. “It’s evidence if I need to prove he is a stalker.”

The blonde scoffed in disbelief but kept in check her amused smirk.  
“He just wants to contact you, it’s not stalkerish.”

“I already told him no a few times but he keeps insisting, that’s pretty much how a stalker would react.”

“You are dramatic,” she frowned at him but he stayed impassible drinking his tea, “he pretty much guessed that he will have to insist with your bad temper. If someone asked me how to get your interest I would start with that.”

“I’m nice enough to not break his face,” he mumbled in defence.

“You would prefer to suck his dick another time instead,” Bebe argued with a small voice, focused on reading the words to find something interesting to tell, or at least to stop Kyle to deny the truth.  
“Look, he just wants to talk— sounds like a date though, maybe he really likes you.”

Kyle wanted to sigh, clear and loud enough for everyone to understand his exasperation. But he crushed that into an angry clicking of his tongue, arms crossed and now glaring at his empty cup. He looked at her fact but quickly brushed it away as it brought him to think about the last time they met.  
“No, he doesn’t like me. Gets hard but it’s not feeling. Where would that come from,” he continued with a disdainful snort.

“Love at first sight, dumbass.”

His eyes silently squinted at her. “We aren’t living in a movie Bebe, it’s not La La Land.”

“You are dramatic enough to be in one,” she countered with clear amusement before she turned toward him with shining eyes. It looked off for him.

“What? What did you find with your unlimited knowledge in romantic movies,” he mocked allowing a small smirk.

The blonde joined with a small chuckle pushing back the laptop in front of his owner. “You would also know every love movies if you had dated Clyde.”

“Just being friend with him forced me to go see every cheesy movie,” Kyle joked straightening on his cushion to look at the e-mail. “What now?”

“You are going to let him live without a reply?”

“Uh, yes,” he implied with an uncomfortable frown, “what do you want me to tell? Fuck off or I’m going to break your neck? I can do that but that would be awkward at the wedding if I don’t do it.”

“Jesus, just tell that you can’t wait for him to suck your dick too,” she exclaimed taking her coffee in hand.

“That won’t happen,” he snarled feeling his cheeks burning, “why can’t you just be with me and help me to get rid of him?”  
At her mocking look he sighed and looked around the cafe to gather words. “What kind of guy goes after the ass of his sister’s boyfriend?”

“Mmh, someone with great taste in ass.”

“You’re not objective.”  
She huffed at his embarrassed argument.  
“He made me cheat on his sister,” he lowly snapped.

“Hold on, Kyle,” Bebe licked her lips before she continued with an annoying brilliant tone, “even if he started you continued. And, please, Shelly, urgh— myself would have jump on the first person with her.”

“You say that because you dislike her.”

“I would officially hate her if you weren’t an asshole being nice to her,” she conceded with a shrug. “Don’t tell me you believe she didn’t ‘cheat’ on you.” Her manicured hands gestured the quotation marks.

“I feel like a slut!” Kyle practically cried out.

“Yeah well I side with slutty Kyle.”

“No you are not,” he glared.

She scanned him with unreadable eyes before she huffed in her cup, looking away toward the counter.  
“You’re such a tsundere,” Bebe mumbled.

“I’m not.”

“Like a moody feral cat wanting dicks,” she continued and he almost hit her if she hadn’t suddenly turned toward him, “that’s it!”

His brain tried to understand her on its own.  
“What?” He grimaced.

“He is a dog, you are a cat— that’s why you two are so trying to fuck.”

Kyle slowly blinked, swallowed and exhaled.  
“Are you drunk?”

“Jesus, I am serious! It’s like an universal rule, dog person and cat person. You two need a fuck I’m a hundred percent sure,” she explained with excited movements of hands while her friend was trying to not flat out leave this nonsense.

“That’s bullshit,” he accused closing his laptop, since he imagined he wasn’t going to use except hitting her with it.

“You know I’m right and you are terrified!”

“I’m terrified of going stupid with your bullshit, yeah.”

Bebe rolled her eyes and sighed. “Alright, Kyle, just tell me one thing.”  
He had stood up from his seat. Weighing his options - he didn’t put his jacket on yet.  
“What size is his dick?”  
His deadass unimpressed eyes followed her fingers slowly showing a growing distance. At some point her face expressed admiration before it melted away in disappointment—her fingers stopped with a great distance between.  
“Okay it can’t be the size of the table.”

“Bye.”  
Kyle simply said like there was no records of any weird topics.

His workspace has this nice room where it’s mostly to chill and get your mind out of horrible things you have to report to the world. Kyle loves to go in there because of the view of the city—it wasn’t the tallest building or the last floor but he could still have an almost omnipotent view.  
Next to him was a silent person, playing with the buttons of his camera to look at pictures; which must brought him here but the ginger didn’t last long without breaking the silence.

“Craig— Do you believe in love at first sight?”

“No.” Craig immediately stated and sniffed.

“Why not?”

His finger was still regularly switching the photos.  
“Because it’s bullshit, we aren’t in a rom-com.”

“Were you ever in love?” Kyle wondered trying to not sound snooty - he isn’t - but the rude answers irched him a bit.

Craig’s gaze glanced at him, no sign of whatsoever in his eyes. His lips pursed a second.  
“The fuck— are you trying to hit on me?”

“W-No! Are you crazy?!” He spatted, leaving the back of the couch with wide eyes.

“You are the fucking one asking me questions,” he retorted.

“Because we are friends,” the ginger tried but it sounded stupid - Craig returned the statement with a small arching eyebrow - so he quickly jumped on another argument, “you are someone with logic— not dumb so I wanted your point of view.”

“Just go ask Bebe, that’s her shit.”

“I can’t.”

“She is the one you love?” He was still settled on the other side of the couch, not moving much.

“No,” he replied with no pause before he frowned at an invisible point, “I’m not in love.”

“That’s the lamest lie I heard.”

“Fuck you, I’m not lying,” his growl glared at him. “I’m thinking,” he specified, “about how that could possibly happen like in books or movies.”

“What’s the point?”

Kyle sighed. He should have expected that Craig wasn’t the best option but he had this feeling of security as he doesn’t care much about anything, and so would barely try to remember any of his words.  
“Bebe stuck it in my head, now I just try to understand why would Romeo kills himself for Juliet.”

That brought a small movement from his shoulders.  
“You fucking takes Shakespeare as an example? It’s simple drama, exaggerated for the play.” He had stopped to scroll through his pictures to look at him in faint judgement.

“It’s because it’s the most known example of crazy love, soulmate, one for me and that kind of crap,” Kyle enunciated with a move of a hand, before a sharp pain in his chest came with a precise image and made it clutch into a fist.  
“You don’t smoke, do you?”

He watched him shake his head before he returned to the city view. That option had stayed in his mind but he wasn’t desperate enough to buy a whole packet or ask a stranger. Or it was just that he would need to acknowledge why he suddenly need to replace a craving desire.  
Smoking would brought another guilt but the chemical could make him feel better with his reflections.

“I don’t believe in love at first sight,” the ravenhead next to him started, exhaling through his nose to pause, “it’s superficial you only see someone and now you would bring the moon for them— more like lust at first sight.”

Kyle was glad that he caught him today. He was rarely passing at the office expect when there were special requests. Craig was logical and not dramatic, speaking only if there was a necessity.  
“Mh true, it’s stupid you don’t know how they are, can’t be love without knowing the inside of their head.”

“That must take time.”

He raised an eyebrow before his eyes slowly travelled to his blank face, glued on observing his camera between his hands. “What?”

“Love.”  
It stopped here for fat minutes. Kyle preferred to look back at the smaller buildings around them.  
At some point Craig moved in his seat, looking uncomfortable all of a sudden.  
“It’s not something you buy and it’s ready and forever, you need to take care of it and not be stupid— like with a pet. I guess if you really love them it’s not hard to do that but I don’t think you can have that with just a glance.”

“Ah,” he let that out without thinking. Craig gave him a look. “You seriously thought about it, like fuck I would have never guessed it was from you if someone asked.”

“I fucking answered to your question, what do you want,” he growled with a flat tone but Kyle supposed he hit a nerve—somehow.

“You were in love with someone, right?” He inquired, not afraid to insist.

Craig’s eyes slightly squinted before he returned to stare at the camera between his hands.  
“Yeah.” That could be the same answer for a snack.  
The ginger almost had the time to ask more about it but he was cut after the dark haired deepened in the cushion with strength.  
“He’s gone.”

His virid eyes immediately widened in sorry and his body was knocked down.  
“Fuck— I’m sorry. I didn’t-“

“I’m fucking with you.”

Kyle stared taken aback before he croaked. “You-what?”  
He breathed before he slowly glared at the clear sparkles of amusement in Craig’s eyes.

“He isn’t dead. I don’t know actually— hope he isn’t.”

“You- fuck you, Craig!" The ginger exclaimed, hitting him with a sharp elbow. He barely moved. “That’s not something to joke about! I seriously—! You can’t say that kind of stuff when you look like a wall.”  
Craig shrugged but was clearly amused by the discreet curl of a corner of his mouth.  
Kyle sighed as he passed a hand through his hair to not punch him to erase his satisfaction. “What’s the story?”

“ ‘bout what?”

“That dude.” He watched him in the corner of his eyes.

“Why would that help you?” Craig asked but without any mischief. He had fully given his attention to him since his face was turned toward him.

“Because we are friends, stop acting like a snob and just tell me. You fucking had a speech about love because you met him.”

He heard him humming, his dark green eyes wandering outside the window. Kyle followed, fully aware that patience was something his friend asked for—even when his curiosity has been burning since he started to form more than three words. Not a lot of people would have an impact on someone as Craig, he supposed that by how he acted in general.

“Tw—" the man sighed instead, "he was in my university. Living in the same dorm as me so we had the common living room and bathroom, but he rarely stayed long out of his room.” His voice had difficulties at first or maybe it was his memories trying to not surface, especially out loud.  
“Guess I had a crush on him since we had met but…”  
Kyle had no idea how to help him, even convinced that one word from him would shut him up.  
“Yeah. I was in love with him. We didn’t talk much, when we passed next to each other I always tried to at least say hi. He was really bad with people, always anxious about everything. Even made him jump once or twice when he didn’t expect me to talk.”  
His eyes squinted out of nowhere and his friend couldn’t help but contemplate the rare distorsion of his face. “I think I stalked him a bit.”

“You think?” He parroted with a wide eyes.

“Hm, yeah, I tried to kind of have the same timing as him to see him. Like at his favorite coffee shop. Token and Jimmy told me it was what would a creepy stalker do,” Craig shrugged melting back into his unemotional stance.

“Wha— okay.” Kyle decided that it was useless to point out anything about his confession, especially when it’s from his university period. “And what happened? You guys were friends?”

“Kinda, he wasn’t a big lover of crowd and as I said he seemed more nervous at making friends than being alone.” His tone was a bit nostalgic, perking up at some words but never much.  
“I didn’t want to push. In four months he was still mostly nervous with me— Token said that’s because I was too flirty but I never did anything like that.”

The ginger had no idea what to say. Craig’s face barely showed that he wasn’t dead; strong feelings as love were a bit unreal.  
“So you didn’t tell him that you liked him?”

“No, honestly, he probably would had a heart attack if I had told that I loved him." Craig stopped before a single snort left him - the redhead was bewildered to see him cover a smile by licking his lips. "He was sooo cute freaking out that I was going to be fat because of his pastries.”  
Kyle felt the fondness from his words but couldn’t not pry on what look on his face he must have right now.

“Pastries? He was studying that?”

“No, I think he baked when he was really stressed and couldn’t stand staying in his room.”

The words fell into a nostalgic silence. The ginger was disturbed about learning all of that but pleased. He wished they would have end up together but the guy seemed really hard to deal with. Kyle had a few experiences with anxious people, most difficult being Tweek and he was still sure that the blond wasn’t completely out of his paranoia or completely at ease outside.  
“What happened then?”

“He left just a bit before the second semester— during the night.” Craig's throat needed to be cleared out. “Nothing about where he left or why. Since there wasn’t a single thing of his stuff everyone believed he just quit.”

“You didn’t have his number?”

“Nah, paranoid about that stuff. He isn’t even on any social media or at least I didn’t find him,” he explained grabbing back his camera but didn’t quite know what to do with it.  
“So what, you love someone or not?”

Kyle pursed his lips, feeling that he hadn’t the authorisation to ask for anything else.  
“No.”

“You are or you wouldn’t talk about it.”

He sighed through his nose before he let his head fall against the top of the couch to stare at the cream ceiling.  
“You know about Shelly, right?”

Craig nodded before he froze. “Fuck—her?”

“No, shut up,” he snarled frowning at an invisible point, “had to meet his family— like last week.”

“Sounds bad.”  
That was his way to encourage him.

“Mmh— I met her brother, little one but he has the same age like me and you.”  
The ravenhead stayed quiet, tapping sometimes on the buttons of his camera. “We— uh, we were walking together in town because Shelly had other plans.”  
Kyle couldn’t believe he was going to speak about that one more time outloud. He believed Craig had no way to turn that story into blackmail but still, he hated to think about that event more than usual.  
“We made out and at the end jacked off in their parent’s bathroom.”

His grimacing eyes were stuck on the blank ceiling. No judgement up there and the worst would be if it was falling on him. His mind was already crushing him like an insect.  
He had heard the breath next to him stopping for a beat.

“You fucking what.”

“And two days ago I sucked him in my car,” he articulated with a burning knot. Kyle bite on his lips and let his head fall right against his palms. The guilt was not more suffocating than usual but there were sparks of self-mutilation in the middle of it.

A loud, horribly _judgemental_, ugly laugh exploded next to him and he felt Craig’s chest heavily shake next to his shoulders. The man had one of those laugh sounding like a cat choking on water. He had only heard it once and now he was possibly one of the rare reason making Craig Tucker bark laughter. If he hadn’t a deep voice he would sound like a child.

“Oh my god!” He exclaimed, still chuckling before he unsuccessfully muffled another hiccup of laugh. “Ah— fuck, Broflovski, I never expected that,” he breathed with a light tone.  
Kyle didn’t budge.  
“So what, now you think you are in love with him because you had his dick in your mouth?”

“No!” He growled straightening up with thunderous pupils, his face was burning in shame and his nerves wanted to hit himself. “Bebe thinks so but I don’t— I hate that guy!”

“The guy you made out with?” A dark eyebrow was a bit raised.

Kyle almost let out his name but he bit on the syllable with an angry groan. “Him. I think he trapped me to trick his sister or something.”

“Wait, he forced himself on you?”

“No— not really,” he mumbled feeling a wave heat. His skins weakly itched under his friend gaze. “He is hot, kind of forgot everytime I see him why I should break his face,” he bashfully explained placing a hand on his bouncing leg.

“So you are interested in him?”

The ginger glared at him. “No.”

“Then why are you asking about love?” Craig’s suspicious grimace brought a icy feeling throughout his spine. “If it’s just sex you wouldn’t wonder about that.”

Kyle deflated. His anger slipped from his dilating eyes before he stared at the floor like a body was hidden underneath. An awfully heartbeat was making his mind sick.

“Hey g-guys,” a voice cut his staring and he immediately tried to look presentable in front of the brunet in crutches—the torturing noise didn't leave his veins.  
“Chilling?”

“Kind of,” Craig replied to his friend at the redhead’s relief. “Jimmy, you know about Kyle’s girlfriend?”

Kyle straightened himself in a hurry, not believing that he was going to leave the room without a wound. He frantically turned to his boss.  
“Craig told me about the guy living in his university dorm he stalked.”

That immediately brought his undivided attention and Jimmy grinned widely. “Oh yeah, m-man he was crazy a-a-about him. Always talking about him and d-d-dro—drooling behind him.”  
Kyle forced a chuckle to escape from his tight throat but he really smiled at the facts.  
“Did he tell that ti-t-time when he had grabbed his ar-arm and turned it to show him a new beauty mark? O-o-of course Craig had saw it but he almost had a nervous bre-break-br—crisis about him knowing that.”

“No one asked you to tell, asshole.”

“Du-dude, you still drink c-coffee to remind him.”

Even if Kyle loves to know things, especially dirty secrets like ‘Craig’s life boner’ - Jimmy’s words - it didn’t bring much in his current situation.

The weeks before the close wedding had been peaceful - uneventful, even uninteresting.  
At least there was no Stan and unless it was the end of the world, they couldn’t ‘randomly’ cross paths.

He was still tortured about what his body; no, what he did with Stan when he was supposed to chit-chat with Shelly’s parents. Worst is, he is also their kid.  
And that happened again. There had even been free exits, he could have punched him, jump in his car and drive over him to just fly away from the temptation or even stay with Shelly the whole night.  
But something in him was a traitor. It managed to reason every good morals to look away so he can dive back—in a beautiful and warm ocean that makes him always whine by the lack of it in his apartment.

There were shades of blue in his place. Some of the pillows on his couch were sea-like but it wasn’t the same, yet he was holding on desperately trying to focus on the TV at the opposite.

He had given up on working when his mind couldn’t even comprehend what he was writing about. Laying on the couch letting some random movie hide his childish mood while he rewind over and over, always, what he had done.

His body had wrapped around Stan's, enchanted kisses and received sparks of fireworks on his skin. It was undeniably warmness lulling him every time he sees Stan.  
By his simple gaze he was already fighting for more. And maybe Kyle is just an experiment for him, to know if men are his thing too or not.  
It would break some parts inside of him but he would agree, not bothered a bit as long as this frail connection could continue until Kyle could retrieve his breath.

He was possibly only deepening more his fall toward the abyss by thinking about it.  
Not that it was bad down here, tasting the guilt and disgust toward his own self even by quietly staying there—but there wasn’t Stan.

The whole purpose.  
The reason for Kyle to break down many decisions just to touch him.

Every thoughts were buried before he allowed himself to open his eyes. To face the mocking sky. To admit that he could not be worse than now.

His body assaulted him with the envy to see or contact him. Thanks to his firm self-control he managed to not do that—and the fact that he will see him anyway at the wedding.  
After that he will need a cure. Something to erase the trace of his crime or at least to make him thinks of something else.

Kyle pursed his lips as he stared at the page he was on his phone.  
He actually had searched for every hints on social media; the Marsh son only uses Instagram and it barely was about his private life. The app was still open, as explained many times to his friends it’s for information to avoid him. Since his research didn’t provide anything than the address of the workplace, he had to jump on looking at his friends.

His research brought a Kenny - appearing to be a childhood friend - who was found thanks to a picture at a music festival. Kyle didn’t look at the black haired girl ‘@wendPRIDE’ draped against Stan.  
‘@69princess’, he wasn’t sure what to get from his username, is more dazzling than his ravenhead friend and seemed to be an impulsive photographer- as the one with Stan always seemed to be taken in annoying surprise. But with his page he found where they mostly hang out—which are definitely where he won’t put a step by miles.

Kyle quickly closed the app when he came back on a summer picture, shirtless Stan. He already remembers the tattoos on him.  
Knowing himself the ginger is painfully aware that it will follow him even after death.

What pissed him more is that what made him snap was still undiscovered. He arrived to the point that he is sure it wasn’t just the lack of ‘boys’ D’ - as Bebe would say - and he had checked that option. Even watched some guys when he went to a bar or wandered on some hook-up app.  
He wasn’t a big fan of meaningless sex, there was the risk of AIDs and he had the misfortune to end up with real shady guys. Kyle was also not easily at ease, showing yourself completely nude was never something he was completely comfortable for, though sometimes he over surpassed that to relieve his libido.  
The main point was that it wasn’t the case this time. He could scroll through millions of hot guys and didn’t get any need to swiftly ask for a meeting. Also he had realized he should change his profile picture on the app, Bebe had put one of his ass—to prove that it was undeniably going to attract everyone. He had agreed to see that dumb test but it was mostly because he was drunk.

If Kyle wasn’t sexually frustrated, he can’t even believed he had acknowledged Bebe’s speculation, then why would he not stop Stan and him from kissing each other all over.  
His life was great and would have still continued on this perfect way if he didn’t agree to meet Shelly’s family.  
Now something was lacking and it burned at every steps. He was caught in a disturbing desire to bring Stan to his apartment.

Guilt and pleasure. The whole sickening package.

“Seriously, you are more messing my hair up than helping,” he complained, fighting her stubborn hands before he settled to catch them, “stop that Shelly.”

“Kyle, come on! You know I want you to look good, why would I mess up?” The brunette argued with a fake-hurt grimace, “just let me hide that curl, that one is getting its way out.”

The ginger sighed through his teeth before letting her hands go. They flew without a second thought to his fiery hair.  
He guessed that some of his curls would reappear at some point during the wedding, but not already in the parking lot. Maybe he should find another product for them, as if he doesn’t have a lot already.

“Okay— I’m sure you are touching more than a curl.”

“Yeah, making sure they aren't going to look too combed,” she replied lacking of concern about her previous promise.

Kyle swiftly stepped back and slapped away one of her hand trying to get back to his head.  
“I try to make them _less_ voluminous. I will seriously be in the bathroom for hours if you keep pushing.”

Shelly sighed, discreetly rolling her eyes and crossing her arms on her low-cut dress. He had told her that lavender suits her—but he was less sure about himself and his matching tie.  
“Alright, you ready to go to that stupid wedding?” She mumbled with a small angry pout.

“Yeah,” he breathed a small laugh and put her arm around his to walk toward the already loud event, “you are still angry for not being a maid of honor?”

“That bitch told me I would,” she grumbled with angry steps making her hairs bounce on her shoulders. “But nooo... Something about a fiance’s cousin being too important to not make her a fucking maid of honor. Can’t believe I lost my time making her the best bachelorette party ever.”  
Kyle muffled a loud laugh, settling on tightening a grin. He wasn’t enjoying her being angry but the whole reason made him realize that was probably a common thing during weddings, which is dramatic.  
“Bet she hopes she will be at mine, like hell.”

“Just have fun,” he offered, looking at the persons in front of them getting inside the illuminated place—it could be like a high school ball if they weren’t so many balloons hearts and pictures of the couple with the word wedding plastered all over.

The rest of her family was still nowhere to be seen and a part of him hoped they miraculously decided to ditch.  
His eyes were still searching for a ravenhead when his feet were stopped not far from the entrance leaking out music.  
He turned to face Shelly who grabbed one of his arm and slided a hand on the back of his neck to kiss him; it quickly made him uncomfortable when she tried to forcefully deepen it, especially when they would easily be noticed and he had got no warning about a kiss coming.

At his relief she left him go to turn his head toward the parking. Kyle choked a small comment about her PDA when he saw her smiling innocently—toward the rest of his family.

“Hey Mom, Dad, turd.”

Kyle froze and faintly believed his blood did the same.  
His spine was senseless except for a creeping and painful feeling.  
Stan’s eyes were on him.

“Hi Shelly,” Sharon happily greeted and went to hug her as she had left her boyfriend’s side. “How are you, Kyle?”

The answer he offered left him with a venomous backstab. He couldn’t _not_ quickly return his attention to their son—just feet away behind them.

Stan turned his face away.  
Something cried out from his expression but he pointedly only looked at the parking lot.

Kyle could only imagine if his reaction meant something; if he needed to look closely at him and find a word at his lack of emotion. Maybe Stan felt the same as him.  
An icing breath infested his veins as he forced a smile. His mind only dust without any surface to work on except that unexpected guilt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this story is like bleh, but I had some fun continuing to write it.
> 
> I'm not sure yet how many chapters it will have. Not a lot. I believe. Depends on if I work on the rest of the characters or not. 
> 
> Thank you for kudos and comments! You can't imagine how much those mean, and for the one who don't even try—I will find you.


	5. In madness and in euphoria, I do

Weddings are loud.

Since he was a kid, Kyle has been used to that. Possibly because of the many, _ many _, weddings he went to since he was born.

Dancing was as necessary as finding good things to say about the night—because who wouldn’t enjoy the night when two people celebrate their love? At some point, he was sick of that kind of mood which he can’t help but link with a hint of hypocrisy and too many exaggerations.

A lot of reasons against the particular Marsh’s cousins wedding has been gathered since he had been officially invited by the happy couple themselves.   
Kyle expected a boring night or in the best case just a tiring one, which would have been more useful in front of Netflix with his mac and cheese.

Alcohol turned to be the only true companion he could believe in to survive the night. It was certainly one of the best way to not be bored to death.

When his lost irises tasted back the view of Stan it had brought a strong, _ very strong _ , urge to drink until his throat would burn. It was not entirely because of the horrible feeling gurgling out of his depths - his brain didn’t let slip out the fact that a suit draped Stan a bit too well.  
His throat tightened and he hastened himself to drink.

But even with a lot of scenarios in his head—in which he had been ready to run away, to have a fake smile or exchange meaningless conversations with other guests; he didn’t expect to sat next to a silent and morn Stan.

Especially when he couldn’t read his eyes but that could be because they didn’t look at each other much. He did guess beforehand that he would sit at the Marsh’s table, the possibility that they might sit next to each other only briefly passed through his mind. It was certainly the only time Kyle would have gladly sat next to Randy.

Everyone had dispatched to wander around family members except for Stan who seemed to have decided to stay in his chair all night. Although he did politely greet acquaintances before turning back to mope.

It was possible to actually _ talk _ with him, but not when your name was Kyle since he barely got a second of his attention. Which he would have certainly _ not _used to say how handsome he looks tonight - in a polite way.

The only Broflosvki has been playing with his glass of wine, listening to various guests making speeches about the newly married as he tried to swallow this horrible weight in his throat.  
Stan wasn’t looking at him, rudely staying on his phone at the moment his hands weren’t occupied by a glass or cutlery. 

Kyle could continue to follow Shelly around but he was sick of being introduced and listen to gossip about people he didn’t know, which brought him to either sit at his table or hide in his car for the rest of the night.

Questions were waiting at the back of his head, but he wasn’t sure if he could ask how Stan was doing. Though it was also a rare chance, since he couldn’t see how he could speak to him with the rest of his family around.  
His decision was still not taken when the raven-head left the table without a glance.

Drinks later, Kyle found Stan not far from the toilets. There was an empty, barely decorated corridor before them and it was possibly the quietest part inside the building.  
Stan’s back was turned toward the part of the corridor where the restrooms’ doors were, comfortably against the wall with one shoulder, probably looking at his phone.  
He seemed to be hiding from the rest of the world or maybe just to ignore everything about the universe—and for a brief second the ginger shared the feeling.

Kyle couldn’t gather the strength to start a talk like nothing had happened. He almost continued toward the man’s door before his feet slowed down to strode toward his side.  
“Stan?”

His attempt brought a startled reaction from the raven-head who briskly turned toward him, eyes wide in surprise. Kyle cleared his throat, a bit undignified of how his voice had sounded.

Stan promptly strained back. His head was back at looking at the other side of the corridor but he didn't move his back.  
A glimpse of pain on his face passed that the ginger barely had caught.  
“What?” His tone was icy but his shoulders dove down as if it gave him the same slap Kyle got.

The redhead drew back the hand he had almost put on his shoulder. As if that would have helped.  
“Sorry I-” He silently weighed his words.  
There wasn’t much he could actually be sorry for. He owed him nothing.  
And nothing was wrong at letting Shelly kiss him.  
“I wanted to be sure you weren’t sick or something.”

A huff littered the air before the man slowly crossed his arms, defensively looking at the wall.  
“I’m great.”

Kyle mumbled a frustrated ‘fine’ but mostly for himself.

He chose to go wash his hands early since he overheard that the caterer was soon going to bring in the entrees. When he had pictured their talk he didn't expect for _someone_ to be so rude - which wasn't his fault. Kyle was perfectly polite and nice.  
At least they only used their mouths to talk.  
But he could easily see that the man still won't offer anything to him when e returned in the corridor. Kyle briskly walked away.

Shelly laughed at another table, as the rest of the people glanced at Kyle behind her with a forced smile. All he wanted was to leave.

His stomach has immediately tightened when she mentioned ‘boyfriend’ _ and _ ‘marriage’ in the same sentence, which by the look of her friends or cousins had given to him was a clear signal. He never guessed that she would say something that _ big _but at the same time it wasn’t that surprising. She really wasn’t scared to lie in front of her family, the only thing he could do was to hope no one - especially her close family - will ask him about it.

So Kyle walked away after a last word with Shelly; he definitely needed to find something to say about that subject that won’t put him in a mess.

The ginger didn’t understand the point of waiting thirty minutes between every steps of the dinner. He got that it allowed people to stretch their legs on the dance floor or travel through every tables, but was it necessary? The only thing he could do was getting drunk and enjoy the short pleasure in dropping liquids into his knotted up stomach.

Stan avoiding him affected him harder than he expected—the why especially ate his heart. He still couldn’t bring himself to find anything to say.

His eyes easily found him alone at their table. The man was still distracting himself with his phone - barely looking where his glass was when he was grabbing it - but his mood seemed to be the same.  
Kyle couldn't find the right word for him and focused on ignoring that he couldn't.

Even more crazy. They _ are not _ close.

They had shared saliva, touched each other dicks—he _almost _ swallowed his semen, and worst is that they barely know more than each other names and yet they already made out two times.  
It was two more than he would have allowed in the craziest world.

Most of the information he has on him came from Bebe’s annoying curiosity and his own need to know more than his pretty face.  
It hadn’t even been satisfying! Kyle still wanted to see his tattoos, to know what he is doing outside of work and since when was he vegan or what kind of music he likes—there was a lot of things he wanted to learn.

But now he couldn’t even face him. Stan had seen him kissing his sister, which had already happened but this time it seemed to be different for her brother. Somehow.  
Or maybe he didn’t mind before.

The redhead had been scared during the car ‘incident’ that Stan would say something irreversible. Even how he had pronounced his name made him agitated; he was pretty sure that he would not say it in the same way now.

Kyle must look like an alcoholic staying that close to the punch but it wasn’t like he had any other place to go. There wasn’t any hard alcohol anyway. An unknown guest like him couldn’t go at a random table without his link to the wedding, and Shelly seemed dramatically busy into exaggerating her life at a corner full of chatters.

Sharon and Randy were definitely out of question. They were the progenitors of Shelly _ and _ Stan, none of that would help him, it would possibly be the worst.

Inhaling the heavy air, he walked back toward his table as he gulped down the rest of his drink. He planned to use the excuse to refill it if it turns bad.  
While he settled down next to the silent raven-head, Kyle kind of hoped to meet his gaze for a second. But he got nothing.

He felt like he had to do something, and not because of some guilt.

“So,” his lips quickly tightened as his thumbs nervously toyed with his empty glass, “are you close with the rest of your family?”

Stan didn’t look like he heard a single thing.  
“Not much,” he replied without sounding sincere.

The ginger slightly wrinkled his nose at the lack of communication, sadly he had no idea how to continue.  
“They are— nice,” he articulated with no hope at getting something from it.

“So you and Shelly talked about marriage?”

This time their eyes were on each other. Kyle tried to not look away from his cold eyes.  
They were still awfully a beautiful blue.

“She made that up,” Kyle replied, probably too quickly for his sake. At the same time he glanced at the table of the married.  
“I’m too young for that,” he added with a small nervous chuckle. His mouth was closed when he realized that he wanted to see what kind of face Stan was making.  
In the first place he shouldn’t even talk about that with him.  
“You, uh, want to get married one day?”

It was turning to be really intruding. The redhead felt like a kid again, struggling to speak with his first crush—or a friend, yeah, he did have troubles to be ‘friendly’ sociable with anyone in general even more when he really wanted to.  
His fiery and passionate nature never helped that part.

Stan stood up from his chair, breaking the short interrogation Kyle had with himself who quickly looked at him.  
“I’m going to take some fresh air,” the man replied, leaving without a glance behind.

The guest left at the table sighed with the hint of a huff as he watched the figure disappearing behind an exit door, properly discreet next to the decorations. At least he had tried to talk to him and multiple times.  
He did try to do something.  
There was no reason for him to feel bad.

Not one.

It awfully crushed him.

The main plate should arrive soon and it was probably what he should wait for. He was going to follow the event of the wedding - without any distractions, which meant ignoring completely Stan and the sickening flutter in his head.  
Soon he will fill his stomach, enjoy the banal chit-chat and stay next to Shelly.

After what happened at the restaurant—Kyle had wondered how it would turn out, maybe even fantasized a bit if they were going to kiss again.  
Not that he wants it to happen.  
Of course not. 

Imagination was just hardly controllable.  
Especially now that his car had been stained with _ this _ and _ that _.

His head has been telling him that he was the cause of the abrupt loss of Stan’s usual lively mood. It’s fully his fault but how could he have expected that he had this kind of influence on him.  
He understood how they started to make out, lustful instincts and attracted to each other brought this result. But he would have never think that he could make him jealous - if that was what shut him down.

Not once he remembered a reaction of this kind during the lunch at his parent’s house or at the restaurant. And Shelly had always insisted on getting touchy to express that they are a couple so it wasn’t like Stan had just seen them kissing for the first time.

The ginger couldn’t decide if he would be wary if he saw Stan kissing someone else. They don't share a traumatic experience that would connect them emotionally; none of what they did could relate to proper _ emotions _ . It wasn’t like that. None of the bullshit that tales showed to pour some love in a world clearly lacking of it.  
Kyle couldn’t imagine that kind of thing to transpire from their _ thing _. But he was aware it needed a name.

His body straightened up after a shallow breath pushed through his tight lungs. Leaving his table with a distress at the lack of something in his hand to distract his body from feelings, Kyle walked toward the exit door he has been staring at.

He had actually expected to search for Stan. Ready to walk around to find where he was, he almost stumbled after the small doorsteps of the exit when he saw him sitting not far on the flourish sidewalk around the building.

The ginger looked around and swallowed his embarrassment, before he agreed that he already was here so he might as well continue.

“Stan?”  
The man clearly heard but didn’t show any sign of response. Kyle is the first one to move toward him. He passed in front of him, hesitating a bit before he sat down at a distinct distance. With a glance, he turned to follow the direction where his cerulean gaze was.  
“Are you going to ignore me for long?” His voice let out, staring at his profile messily lightened by the bulb over the exit door. His tone lacked of disinterest even sounding truly hurt. But Kyle ignored that to notice the tightening of his lips. “At least tell me why you’re angry at me.”

“I’m not,” Stan tensely replied and exhaled as a hand passed on his face, “I’m— I’m not angry at you.”  
It stayed against his check, supporting him with his elbow on his thigh, hiding something.

“But you…”  
His lips were pressed together before the ginger decided to lick his hesitation away from them. “You don’t look like it.”

Kyle frowned when he think he heard in his mumbling a ‘like’ and ‘care’.  
But in the end the son of the Marsh only sighed out loud. “Just had a bad day.”

It was probably a lie. He didn't know if he should try to talk again.  
“Alright.”

Kyle could take his phone out instead of watching a tasteless night sky which seemed to be the other man’s only occupation.  
Something contained him to not be as rude at him, not that he considered Stan crude but the lack of talking irritated him.

“How— did you two meet?” The raven-head wondered out and even if Kyle wasn’t sure what he meant he was relieved that the silence was cut. “You and Shelly,” Stan murmured it but that seemed to be for himself. The redhead found that unsettling especially by the hurt in his eyes.

Kyle watched his eyes glued on the ground, barely recognizing the ocean hue in his eyes when he thought about them once or twice during the day. He put that on the somber evening and instead joined the contemplation of the cement—even when he almost pointed out a shade of the sky during a night out with his friends to describe the color of Stan's eyes.  
Fucking Clyde and his questions.

As a kid he hadn’t been that mesmerized by blue.

“Like she said,” he wetted his lips, “common friend, common party.”

“Ah… Great.”

Shelly’s plus-one nodded without confidence. “Nothing special,” he simply added without getting any response.

“Do you-“ the pause was frustrating but Kyle didn’t have words either—“you love her, or uh, well you wouldn’t be with her if it wasn’t the case.”

“Stan-”

“Oh my God,” he cut with a groan and buried his face in his hands, “I’m sorry, I drank a bit.”

The ginger wanted to roll his eyes but a smirk made its way. “At least the alcohol is free, it’s one of the good things at weddings,” he poorly joked as he shifted his foot against the ground. 

The man next to him snorted a bit and Kyle glued his feet together as he restrained a smile to appear on his face.  
“True.”  
Kyle was still not sure if he could look at him right now.  
“I’m sorry, you must be so bored here. And Shelly is staying with the girls,” Stan inquired bumping a second against him as he adjusted his ass on the cold cement.

It was probably Kyle’s fault that he miscalculated the distance between them when he had sat down.

The air was carrying a soft chilly wind that brought small comfort. He should have taken his jacket with him - still it was better than being inside, listening to the crowd and suffer in silence.   
His ass was getting cramped so he will have to move at some point. But Kyle enjoyed their shoulders against each other.

“I don’t mind,” the redhead replied at last.  
It wasn’t like they would talk much or something that he will have a real interest for.  
“It’s nice here, I like the nights during summer,” he explained, glancing to the man who was not that discreet at staring at him. “And you also look bored. We are keeping each other company.”  
He timidly smiled to him but his breathtaking cerulean gaze didn't hold long with his.

On the other hand he was relieved of that. A small fire in the bottom of his stomach didn’t stop from growing.

His brain had imagined how the wedding would go. Many ways of how Stan and him will greet each other or possibly talk—he had predicted that he will not really follow Shelly and stay at the table but he had thought that Stan would go see other cousins.  
Kyle had even been ready to see him bringing someone which would have been a good thing for him to not feel responsible about his mood.

A small part of him had feared what could happen if they definitely settled down somewhere alone. How lucky he was that he buried that.  
Kyle was definitely not sexually frustrated. If— _ If _ he was looking at how the discreet biceps of Stan flexed everytime he shifted around, it was just only to not meet his eyes.  
He just compared the shades of their white cream shirts.

“Uhm, so, like, did you— date a lot of people?” Stan questioned before he cleared his throat as he put his chin up. “Before my sis’.”

The word sis sounded forced.

“Like serious relationship or every kind?”

“The— what does that mean?” One of Stan’s eyebrow shot up, incredulous.”What _ kind _?”

Kyle sputtered a bit before he let out a short laugh. One of his hands flew folded in front of his mouth to not reveal too much of his enjoyment but he was glad that he kept his face blank for that question. For a second, it was natural to be comfortable next to someone haunting him with simple jet black hair.

“I only dated two people seriously— like for months. In high school it wasn’t that serious so I don't really count it, and she ended up going out with almost with every dudes in my class at the same time.”

“Wait, seriously? _ Dude _, who does that?” He interrupted with a big frown that made the ginger smile a bit. The scoff he had prepared to make his answer less dramatic and horrible was lost somewhere.

“I don’t care now, it was just a small crush. It wasn’t that bad.” The redhead shrugged, it was amusing to talk about that old time. He imagined that it would have even be better with Stan, it’s not like it had been bad but he just knew that they could have probably been friends—or something like that.  
“How about you? Lot of girlfriends I guess?”

He had guessed that he would embarrassingly react and Stan _did_ immediately flush and glance at the ground. A part of him hoped that he caught on the small hiding compliment he threw in there. It was going to fire back, but if Kyle wasn’t one of those kids playing with danger he wouldn’t be here either.

“Hum, actually only one— I stayed with her through junior and senior years, kinda was my first love and it, just, happened.” His uncertainty was raw, maybe he didn’t want to share.

“Sounds like a great girl.”   
Kyle felt like he had to put a nice comment.  
“You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to,” he pressed, exhaling the comfort he gained through Stan’s.

“No, no— it’s not that,” the raven-head exclaimed shaking a bit his head. “Just, hum… You did already date guys? _ Men _?”

The ginger frowned a bit, not excepting for him to ask that. Stan had told him that he had just an ‘experiment’ with a guy, which easily told the rest of the story for Kyle.  
“Yeah.”

His green eyes were locked toward the cloud forming in the sky, looking like they were preparing a nasty blow but it wasn’t enough to make him miss the little response next to him.  
“Oh.”

“Had been the longest with a guy, almost one year, ” he specified without thinking to see what face he is making. Or it might too much for him.

“That’s-that’s awesome. Uhm, why didn’t it work?”

The reason was a bit cruel, from Kyle point of view at least. Self-judgement was more efficient than others’; but he will find it a bit harsh if Stan would share the same judgement he had on him about that.  
He could remember how his mother almost thought he was insane to break a good relationship.

“It’s, well, I guess I’m kind of a bitch.”   
He didn’t want to know any type of reactions Stan might have, so he returned back to what he assumed was raining clouds in the distance.

“I stopped to love him. Not—not bored because I still like to hang out with him but it was different. I think he did too but like after we broke up. Davíd is great so I feel bad but I think he already found someone else or at least he restarted to date,” he let out without registering how revealing it was.  
Quickly clasping his mouth shut - his embarrassing gibberish only reached his brain when he met Stan’s surprised irises. He looked away with warm cheeks.  
“Sorry. I should have said just normal break-up,” Kyle mumbled and passed a hand through his hair. “I babble a lot.”

“No. It's alright.” He peered at him but Stan hesitated to continue, he did when he glanced away; Kyle followed the direction because it seemed that the ground was the best interest at the moment.  
“I get it, I mean— I understand. And I don’t mind to listen,” he explained with his attention glued on the concrete.

“Thanks.” The embarrassed ginger softly smiled to thank him. Stan only looked at him for a beat before the ground was back to be the most important thing in the world.  
His usual habit to get carried away in a lot of conversation often brought people around to shut him up, which he understood at some point because his throat had often been itchy of his own chitchat.  
But he wasn’t going to tell about that side of him.  
“So, what about you? After high school?”

“Oh, uhm, not much.”

Kyle didn’t push, supposing he didn’t want to talk more about himself. A bit disappointing but there wasn’t anything he could do. Even if he wanted to know.  
But he guessed that he didn’t have to go to any college for his job and it might be why there was ‘not much’.

For short beats he gave the dark clouds his attention before he hesitantly glanced to the jet-black hair. They were supposedly darker than the shades floating in the sky, Kyle was almost certain and would have the answer if the light of the exit door didn’t spoil Stan.  
“Am I your experience?”

“A what?” Stan turned to look at him, eyebrows puzzled.  
Kyle didn’t think a second that he should have not let it out as a whisper. But he was worried.  
Their shoulders were still against each other. Enough of a proof for him to be sure that he was able to hear his breaths—Kyle was aware of Stan’s. 

“With boys. You only had girlfriends and that one thing with a guy but you suddenly kissed me.”  
The man immediately froze. The ginger was faking confidence but he has whitened a bit.  
“I am some kind of crash test?” He added to insist.  
It sounded harsh but at least that settled the mood.

“Dude, no,” Shelly’s brother slowly mumbled, becoming more and more agitated and uncomfortable. His shoulder even left the contact.  
“It’s not like that… Not at all— actually I-I don’t know?”  
A hand flew to his neck before it roughly brushed the end of his hair.

“That’s-“

“It’s not like that,” Stan pressed, hardening his posture before a frustrated sigh escaped him when he put his hands together between his thighs.  
Kyle decided to not say anything as a burning contact stroke him, yet he was the one who closed the distance. He looked at the leg he had placed against Stan’s before he simply went to watch the tasteless night shifting toward an end.  
“I wish I knew.”

The answer fumbled to reach Kyle’s brain, fighting through millions of knots and what he wanted to be ignorance. Their bodies seemed closer than before. He relished on it silently, hoping that his warmness could pass to his partner.  
“Me too,” the ginger managed to whisper, surprisingly able to when his throat felt so tight.

Stan possibly nodded because he felt a small movement but he kept on observing everything that wouldn’t make him remind their positions. What was happening was foreign.  
“Are you, uhrm— you know, the top or the bottom?”  
The air stopped to move out of his lungs and Kyle was sure his eyes were going to widen forever.  
“Fuck, I’m-” the raven-head swore more before he muffled a small and short scream in his hands. “I shouldn’t ask that. I’m so sorry, ignore me.”

“Did you just ask me how I have sex with guys?”  
Stan shyly nodded.  
“Why?” Kyle croaked back at his hidden face.

“I don’t know,” he mumbled with a small shake of the head. “ ‘M drunk.”

The redhead breathed in a sigh before he nibbled his bottom lip for a second.  
“I can do both.”

He watched Stan cautiously retreating from his hands. His cheeks were still a bit pink when he swallowed and hesitantly glanced at Kyle. “Ha, uh, that’s uhm cool?”

He scoffed at his conflicted face. It was between encouragement and embarrassment.  
“Thank you?”

“How do you… shift between men and women?”

“I don’t choose. I was mostly with men.”  
Kyle almost scoffed. His eyes closed for a second when the sky started to overwhelm him. His head wasn’t spinning but something close to that losing dizzy feeling.  
It was too dark to find answers there.  
“I just follow my feelings.”

“Your feelings.”

“Yes,” he nodded with a clear lack of motivation. It was as breathing air but it was just the strict necessary, not demanding more than the minimum. “Feelings." His shoulders shrugged just the minimum to not bother their constant contact. 

“That’s-” Stan cleared his throat and swallowed; once, twice, again and again—”that’s great. I like that, I mean feelings too.”

“Great,” Kyle tried to smile, not sure if it was as encouraging as he wanted it to be.

The night stayed restless, obnoxiously lacking of answers which was something he never liked. It didn’t mean he would insist, because he didn’t want to be something unpleasant for Stan. Which sounded dumb right now since he had erased his more or less chipper mood a while before.  
He couldn’t decide if it was from his short kiss with Shelly or if there was something else there too—after all, he had thrown his ass out of his car after their make out session the last time they saw each other. But it couldn’t have been the other way around either - he was not going to drive him home like they are ‘friends’ or offer him something to drink.

They weren’t even what Kyle could consider more than acquaintance. The raw example was next to him.  
Barely talking.

He wondered what he had even expected when he had decided to follow him. Maybe to help him or to quiet down a part of his heart telling him to do something about his sad eyes.  
If only Stan would explain to him what seemed to bother him that much, he would stop the discreet satisfaction he had when he imagined that he was - _maybe _\- jealous.  
It was a bit crazy to imagine that - he definitely wouldn’t if Bebe hadn’t put the idea that Stan might like him in his brain; there wasn’t a lot of chances and he actually shouldn’t care.   
He will only look once in a while at this possibility to mock himself and the universe.

“Can I ask a question?” A hoarse tone interrupted.

He glanced at him but the attention wasn’t returned.  
“Yeah.” Kyle’s answer left a bit weak.

Stan didn’t move, as if he hadn’t heard or he just had a violent stroke and died on the spot, except for his eyes that travelled across the cements with irregular pauses. He shifted one of his foot.  
“Do you think you’re going to stay with my sister?” He slowly pronounced without a change on his blank face, or from what Kyle could see. "Like for long?”

He would have take _ any _ other questions. Even if he exactly knew the answer, he wasn’t sure what to do.  
Now, Stan looked at him with his usual appealing irises and even when he avoided to meet them they were still in his mind. Kyle was sick.

“No,” he whispered before he nervously stretched his legs and fold them back. There was an explanation, one simple and clear but he didn’t decide to let the truth out.  
Her brother was also one of the reason now.

The man next to him took a deep breath and for a second leant against his shoulder.  
“Is— Is that why you kissed me?”

“I didn’t-”

“In the car,” he replied barely letting him the time to frown.

Kyle almost let out an innocent ‘ah’ but instead he tightened his lips when he felt a sinking feeling at the bottom of his stomach.  
Turning away, he distractedly tried to hear something from the building but even the music was cut out. His answer only came when his throat was capable enough to not show the knot inside.  
“It doesn’t matter.”

His breath stopped in his throat when he heard a deep offended ‘what’. Without registering that Stan actually looked _ angry _ —when he was glaring at him with a tensed frown, he glanced up at his figure who left his space without a beat and seemed ready to pin or punch him.  
“It doesn’t matter?” He repeated with a deep mocking tone. “It _ does _! What about me?!”

The ginger anxiously glanced toward the door behind him, knowing that Stan’s bitter voice wasn’t discreet but also hoping that someone would stop what seemed to be a one way to disaster. His face only presented outrage and an annoyance.

“What about you?” His lips cautiously parotted and with a sincere lack of mockery.

“I mean why do you still kiss Shelly?!” Stan spat without a second of reflexion and he seemed to only realize what he just said when Kyle answered.

“Because she is— she is my girlfriend,” he replied almost letting it sounds like a question.  
A silence overwhelmed the raven-head who flushed and not completely turned away with a throaty sigh. Kyle quietly watched one of his hand nervously tousling his neat black hair.  
“Stan, I’m sorry,” he said, “for the car.”

No answer, physical, oral or whatsoever, he could barely know if he heard him or not. It started to be an unpleasant habit.  
There was nothing to add. Kyle could only admit that he also _ overstepped _ but nothing more. If he could have avoid any other encounters he would have, but he also had to be present as Shelly’s boyfriend.  
Which seemed to be the problem here—for Stan; when it was the first thing he had learnt about Kyle.  
His hand almost flew to reassuringly settle on his forearm but he wasn’t sure if that was for the best.

“That’s not the problem.”  
His whimper, barely audible thanks to his face resting against his folded arm, brought Kyle to grab his arm and tug him to turn and properly face him.  
He wanted to call his nonsense, to find a proper explanation for him - at least to put a noun to the _ reason _ because at this rate Kyle will continue to believe that it was jealousy.  
And he couldn’t swallow that possibility without listening to the atrocious butterflies in his intestines.

“I— Is there something I can do? To help?” The proposition even unsettled him since it sounded a bit too much. He was sure of him, but wished he wasn’t going to ask anything.  
But Stan didn’t say anything, he fully turned his head toward him exercising a heavy pressure with his cerulean irises. The man was about to say something but he closed his mouth and glanced for a second at the ground.  
“Nothing?” He croaked, seeking to earn a ‘yes’.

The raven-head frowned and for _ too long _ eyed him up and down before he did what Kyle just realized he has been scared of. He moved closer.  
Leaning toward him, his lips could kiss him now except that didn’t happen—even when the ginger didn’t try to create a distance.

It was suffocating. The wave of heat peppering a shiver equalled an icy bite, fracturing the peace-like feeling he had when their forehead touched.

It was the same sensation over and over again. One he had no idea how to fight back, or even find the desire to. Kyle wasn’t even sure he had felt something like that before they kissed.  
“Nevermind,” Stan finally mumbled. The redhead shouldn't get suck up in his eyes that easily.  
“I can’t even understand myself.”

A burning knot was surpassing his capacity to talk but he kindly didn’t move. Stan didn’t stop to look down, even when the rest of his body fully faced him in a slow motion; he probably felt the curly hair against his forehead.  
Kyle placed a hand on Stan’s arm resting on his folded leg—he now preferred to watch everything about Stan that wasn’t his face, especially when the man had shyly caught his hand.

Now that he was at the edge of his fear.  
It didn’t look that bad.

The soft chuckle almost made him follow the short normalcy. He changed his mind when their foreheads softly brushed when Stan moved.  
His skin felt bothered, sadly the good kind of, except that it reminded him a terrifying something that kept pushing further inside of him. The temptation was quick at overcoming his other thoughts.

Even his lungs seemed to have given up and settled on letting him die without fresh air.  
He was still somehow breathing but it felt tasteless in comparison of everything else, especially the sensation seeping into his skin—intoxicating enough for him to feel a deadly satisfaction.  
It spread from the tips of his lips and soon added a new flavor on his tongue.

They kissed.

Kyle eagerly brought him closer, one hand grasping the back of his hair while Stan brought their tangled hands to squeeze against Kyle’s thigh while the other one grabbed his hip with an intense gentleness.

Their teeth hit after they caught a quick breath and he would have apologized if the ginger didn’t shush him with another kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's really nice of you if you read this.  
Please leave a comment and have a nice day (:


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